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Had A Crazy Dream


ekimswish

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Oh my god! Second time in a row I've written a book only to have it lost to a computer error! Maybe computers hate my writing? lol Here it is again in a nut shell:

- Hear about Philippines deporting 14 Taiwanese criminals to China instead of Taiwan? Was big news in the Phils, but Taiwanese don't care, since they were criminals. Still, Noy's gov't is refusing to apologize and Taiwan is threatening to quit hiring Filipinos.

- I move tomorrow to a great location in Taipei, between two large universities.

- I realized, being alone, this is the year to answer the question I've had since getting married and having children: if things were different, would I have reached my goals in life?

- Inspired by that thought, I've decided to study Chinese again, when not teaching, and maybe look for other work and scholarship opporunities in the future not involving English teaching.

- Inspired to lose weight and save money, I decided not to drink by myself for one month. I'm loving it and very happy sober, but then realized I was still smoking. Why quit one addiction only to depend on another? Now I'm 5 days without a smoke and two weeks without a drink.

- Smoking is hard to quit, even though I've only smoked for two months. The problem is it doesn't seem like a problem. Smoking minds it's business, letting you be you. Drinking requires a committment to getting a bit drunk, and you'll feel it in your gut. Smoking is a friend that minds its business, making it a sneaky habit to say no to.

- The reason I often feel I need a drink or a smoke is because I'm sitting around watching so much TV! If I cut back on the TV, I wouldn't really care for a drink in the first place.

- I won't have my own computer for at least a few months at my new place (borrowing a friend's now), so I'll have the perfect opportunity to study Chinese and read books again.

- After so many years as a family guy, slaving away at work only to go home, play with the kids, watch TV and have a drink, it's nice to have freedom to dream again. Obviously I love my wife and kids, but this is a chance to prove to myself if I have what it takes to be the man.

- The best thing about having a dream is.... having a dream.

- My wife found out the farm hand actually did lie and steal from us while we were in Korea, so she'll be fired.

- She would have been laid-off anyways since I have decded to close down the main portion of our farm for a few months while I make money and consider things.

- I'm actually glad we experienced this small defeat because it's the only way my wife would truly see what I was warning her about - too trustworthy and naive. Maybe this lesson will pay off in the future.

- Now that her way didn't quite work out, it's time for my way: slow.

Life.... what a crazy dream. But I love it.

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Neat, keep on trucking my friend and you will find your own level of comfort. :541:

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Jake

Posted

I can relate on what you're going through. Separated from family for months at a time, the boredom, restlessness and loneliness can sometimes lead idle minds to unnecessary "vices". You've been around the block a few times. Just remember you do "have what it takes to be the (family) man". Where is the nearest hoop or a 400m track to burn those idle calories? There's got be a couple Hash runs nearby or making new friends on the tennis courts. If you need someone to talk to on a routine basis, PM me and we could hook up via email.Stay safe my friend -- Jake

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ekimswish

Posted

Thanks Jake. I'm actually doing quite well with it, especially since I stopped drinking home alone. I've played a ton of ball since being back in Taiwan, almost everyday. Now that I'm finally settled in an apartment, I'm off to find the rec center to work out at. I bought a book for writing Chinese characters today. I got a 1998 swimsuit edition plastered all over my wall, so I'm not lonely in the least. I actually got a lot of Taiwanese friends. I guess what got lost in the blog when the computer lost the blog was that I'm actually very happy and upbeat now, ready to study again and live a healthier, more ambitious lifestyle than I have the last 4 years with kids. No excuses this year for why I didn't do this or didn't do that. No kids to blame! lol

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Jake

Posted

Ohh yeah.....Miss Heidi Klum on the cover of 1998 Swimsuit Edition. Excellent way of taking care of loneliness. You are also blessed with making new friends very easily wherever you visit. Anyway, you know how to reach me if the "dark force" falls upon you......he, he.Respectfully -- Jake

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Old55

Posted

It's good that you have a chance to step away and do some reflecting on your life and choices. I know you miss your family all the same.Your story brings many memories to me. It was nearly forty years ago a very lonely 19 year old living in my little apartment in Taipei so far from home. Someday we will do a short visit I'm sure it has changed beyond anything I would remeber. What I wouldent give to revisit Snake Market.

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MikeB

Posted

" The reason I often feel I need a drink or a smoke is because I'm sitting around watching so much TV! If I cut back on the TV, I wouldn't really care for a drink in the first place. "
Exactly. I have never smoked but sitting around watching TV lends itself to excessive drinking. It's a dangerous trap I am all too familiar with. Need to get off my a** and experience life! Thanks for the update.
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ekimswish

Posted

Lol.... waiting for my first payday in about 16 days, I got no TV, no computer (at home), no money, and a lot of free time! I also got no heater and it's 14 degrees outside and in my room, where I got no blankets! awwww god..... Anyways, I'm enjoying the experience. It's definitely different. I can work out at the community center for under $2 a pop, and I have two big universities nearby, so there's lots of Taiwanese night market food around. i got an old friend coming to visit tonight who I haven't seen in years, so we'll see how cheaply I can get wasted.

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