Catherine, Denden And Venus Squatter / Street Kids

[Bruce]

In early 2009, I was in Samar and came across Cartherine, Denden and Venus. Catherine was 6 or so and Den and Venus were 12. Catherine's father was in the local jail waiting for transportation to the prison in Tacloban and is to serve 17 years for a stabbing. Catherine and her 3 siblings and mother ALSO lived at the jail in the family area. Catherine supported the whole family, at age 6, by begging on the street. She spoke no English but followed the method of begging by the older kids. She was a cute scrawny kid. So I of course donated money to her. A 100p note which was more than she ever got before. she ran off to the jail to give it to her mother and then came back. She ended up early in the morning outside my hotel waiting for me. So every morning off to Jollibbee we went. It took me a while to learn her story and after I did I got her 3 meals a day and made sure I gave her at least 500p a day for her family. Venus and Den saw me at Jollibee with Catherine. Older white guy and $$$ in their eyes. Neither spoke english, but my woman friend (always with me) took care of the translations. They, like the other street kids have their routine of getting up in the morning, begging for money for food and waiting for a shrimp boat to arrive. Then about 20 street kids, each paid 10p, would peel all the shrimp. After that an ocean swim to remove the shrimp smell and then back to begging for money. Over time and several trips we repeated this again and again. Catherine's father is in prison now, I pay a nominal amount for her family to live with the grandmother in 1 room. Installed a toilet and electric lights for them. Bought Catherine her first mattress and pillow. I paid to have all 3 go to school. Catherine is now in 2nd grade and seems to be not very smart, but is a good student and causes no trouble. DenDen was 12-13 and the school put him in 2nd grade. That lasted several months. He could not adjust. I allowed him to live in my house for a while, but there again, he could not adjust and wanted to sleep outside with the other street kids at the market. So my only contact with him now is when I am there I buy him clothes and 'slippers' and give him some cheap gifts and he sells it all after I leave. He also can not read or write, so.... and this is a biggie!... He can't use a cell phone (I pay) because he can't read / write txts! He is destined to a life of petty crime or manual labor. His father is a pedicab driver, always drunk and sleeps in his pedicab. When Den was younger, he was 'a kid' and people felt sorry for him and begging was easy. Now at 14, not so cute any more, he is finding out that his adult life does not look so good. Now Venus...... Now 14, still no breasts, but very cute and knows it. Is sexually active with different low life drivers. Has disappeared a few times for a couple of weeks, and I am assuming she is pregnant and in hiding until the hilot massages that baby out of her. Then back to the usual routine. I pay for her schooling. She goes 3-4 days a week and does very well. But is not committed to any real education. She still runs wild at night with her friends. Scams money out of me with phony project fees for school and gives it to her parents for their food. I hired her mother as a helper, she is a GRO by trade and is not reliable, drinks too much, but does well entertaining the workers at the house construction. She is pregnant and I declined to adopt her kid. Once born I assume she will find someone who wants a baby and then back to Manila and the bars. I am not positive Venus knows her mother is a GRO as Venus talks about her mother getting a helper job in Manila. I also have 9 other kids in schools but I do not know their histories. My woman friend follows up with the families and teachers and I am simply the 'sponsor'..... All in all, it does not cost me much by western standards, and I do pay a lot more than I really need to. But I saw a need, and made an attempt to fill that need, in my budget. Denden is a lost cause. Venus will move onto being a GRO or looking for a white husband on the internet as her family wants her to. Catherine will be the interesting one to watch. While she comes from stupid genes, and a bad environment, I found her young enough to start her on a good path to education and a future. I am building a boarding house and I have added on a small room for her and Venus to share. Time will tell how they do, but while I might not make a huge difference, I at least see that they eat and have some educational opportunities....

Edited September 2, 2011 by Bruce

[sjp52]

Yes there is so much sadness here in the Philippines and it seems like no one cares. I,m really glad that you are hear to brighten up the life of a few of the unfortunate ones. Keep up the good work Bruce. You are a special man to go beyond the norm of helping and no matter what differences we have in our thoughts your actions speak louder than words :(

[Bruce]

Why thank you. Yes, I do enjoy what I do. I am often asked why don't I help people in the US and it gets down to attitudes. In the US there are people who not only expect 'help' but also demand it. If help is not given then the name calling starts. In the Philippines I have not yet had that problem. Nice people, take all they can get, but when you run out, they accept it. In the past 2 days, Venus's mother was found to be stealing things from the house and then one of the daughter-in-laws came forward that she and the other helper found things hidden in the dirty kitchen (as opposed to the clean kitchen inside I suppose) in a bag ready to be taken out of the house. I don't mind her being a GRO, and because she is pregnant (noooo, not mine) and Venus's mother, I was paying her a bit more than needed and giving her a sack of rice every month as well as food every day. But stealing from the family is not a good thing, so I do believe she will be loking for employment tomorrow. If anyone is in the market for a 35+ yr old pregnant GRO..... let me know! I have her put on the bus!

[sjp52]

We had a maid one time that when we hired her she showed up with one small bag of clothes ( she was a live in ). My wife treated like a daughter. Took her out and bought her a new out fit and was just very kind to her. One day the girl did something bad and my wife scolded her, The next day she was gone never to be heard from again. A week later my wife noticed she was missing a lot her clothes. She found out from the neighbors that the girl left with 3 bags of cloths. I went to the sari sari store one day and the lady said when will you pay your bill and I said what bill. She said your maid has been buying things on credit every day. The store lady figure that I would be good for it. I paid the lady but told her that she was never to do that again or I would not buy from her store again. She apologized. She new that I was a very big customer sometimes buying up all of her stock on certain items.

[Fred & Mimi]

In early 2009, I was in Samar and came across Cartherine, Denden and Venus. Catherine was 6 or so and Den and Venus were 12. Catherine's father was in the local jail waiting for transportation to the prison in Tacloban and is to serve 17 years for a stabbing. Catherine and her 3 siblings and mother ALSO lived at the jail in the family area. Catherine supported the whole family, at age 6, by begging on the street. She spoke no English but followed the method of begging by the older kids. She was a cute scrawny kid. So I of course donated money to her. A 100p note which was more than she ever got before. she ran off to the jail to give it to her mother and then came back. She ended up early in the morning outside my hotel waiting for me. So every morning off to Jollibbee we went. It took me a while to learn her story and after I did I got her 3 meals a day and made sure I gave her at least 500p a day for her family.Venus and Den saw me at Jollibee with Catherine. Older white guy and $$$ in their eyes. Neither spoke english, but my woman friend (always with me) took care of the translations. They, like the other street kids have their routine of getting up in the morning, begging for money for food and waiting for a shrimp boat to arrive. Then about 20 street kids, each paid 10p, would peel all the shrimp. After that an ocean swim to remove the shrimp smell and then back to begging for money. Over time and several trips we repeated this again and again. Catherine's father is in prison now, I pay a nominal amount for her family to live with the grandmother in 1 room. Installed a toilet and electric lights for them. Bought Catherine her first mattress and pillow.I paid to have all 3 go to school. Catherine is now in 2nd grade and seems to be not very smart, but is a good student and causes no trouble. DenDen was 12-13 and the school put him in 2nd grade. That lasted several months. He could not adjust. I allowed him to live in my house for a while, but there again, he could not adjust and wanted to sleep outside with the other street kids at the market. So my only contact with him now is when I am there I buy him clothes and 'slippers' and give him some cheap gifts and he sells it all after I leave. He also can not read or write, so.... and this is a biggie!... He can't use a cell phone (I pay) because he can't read / write txts! He is destined to a life of petty crime or manual labor. His father is a pedicab driver, always drunk and sleeps in his pedicab. When Den was younger, he was 'a kid' and people felt sorry for him and begging was easy. Now at 14, not so cute any more, he is finding out that his adult life does not look so good.Now Venus...... Now 14, still no breasts, but very cute and knows it. Is sexually active with different low life drivers. Has disappeared a few times for a couple of weeks, and I am assuming she is pregnant and in hiding until the hilot massages that baby out of her. Then back to the usual routine.I pay for her schooling. She goes 3-4 days a week and does very well. But is not committed to any real education. She still runs wild at night with her friends. Scams money out of me with phony project fees for school and gives it to her parents for their food. I hired her mother as a helper, she is a GRO by trade and is not reliable, drinks too much, but does well entertaining the workers at the house construction. She is pregnant and I declined to adopt her kid. Once born I assume she will find someone who wants a baby and then back to Manila and the bars. I am not positive Venus knows her mother is a GRO as Venus talks about her mother getting a helper job in Manila. I also have 9 other kids in schools but I do not know their histories. My woman friend follows up with the families and teachers and I am simply the 'sponsor'.....All in all, it does not cost me much by western standards, and I do pay a lot more than I really need to. But I saw a need, and made an attempt to fill that need, in my budget. Denden is a lost cause. Venus will move onto being a GRO or looking for a white husband on the internet as her family wants her to. Catherine will be the interesting one to watch. While she comes from stupid genes, and a bad environment, I found her young enough to start her on a good path to education and a future. I am building a boarding house and I have added on a small room for her and Venus to share.Time will tell how they do, but while I might not make a huge difference, I at least see that they eat and have some educational opportunities....

Sorry to sound like a dummy...I know what a BRO is but a GRO? I did a search for GRO but nothing came up. Can anyone enlighten me please. Thanks

[Jollygoodfellow]

GRO = Guest Relations Officer. Simple terms prostitute but the GRO is used as prostitution is illegal in the Philippines so its hidden by more or less saying the girl is just being a nice host. :541:

[Candyman]

GRO = Guest relations officer ! A nice term for a prostitute.GRO = Guest relations officer ! A nice term for a prostitute.

[JJReyes]

There are two kinds of street children. "Street Working" are children who earn a living to help support the family by selling to motorists and pedestrians bottled water, cigarettes, flowers, trinkets, etc. They don't attend school. They do go home to a family at night even if it is a slum dwelling. "Street Living" are children abandoned by their parents. They survive by belonging to a gang, which also serves as a surrogate family. Begging, stealing and rummaging through garbage is how they feed themselves. These are the kids you see sleeping on cardboard boxes in alleys and under bridges. If there is no food, street living kids sniff glue. Like Denden, once they become accustomed to the lifestyle, it is hard for them to adjust to what we consider a normal life.Venus will more likely follow her mother's profession. Bruce is correct about being more optimistic about Catherine. Unless she is very close to Venus, one suggestion is to separate the sisters by placing Catherine under the care of another family. It could be a neighbor so Catherine can continue to interact with hers. Placing Catherine in a different environment provides a disciplined routine, which is a requirement as part of normalcy. This includes daily hygiene; expectations like going to school; playing with children of the same age; and being home at night.

[Bruce]

Well this is in the area of Catbalogan, Samar. I have seen pop reports of about 100,000 people in the greater town area. There are very few private cars, NO taxi cars and no traffic lights. I have seen only 2 actual STOP signs and of course, stopping is optional. The street kids are not really the same hustlers you see in Cebu or Manila. Very few actually sell things and it is usually vinegar or balut or fish or similar product. No bottled water, no sunglass or other stuff you see kids selling in the city area. I have not seen any actual gangs, but I do see groups of kids.The kids are as the post above says, different types. Some are discarded kids with similar sounding stories such as violence at home or mom's new husband is not my father so he kicked me out....In Denden's case, the mother left about 2004. There are 4 kids, 2 girls and 2 boys with Denden being the youngest. I have met an older brother and sister, and while friendly to Denden, they are more like cousins and not close at all. Denden's father is a small man who rents a pedicab every day (about 50 p) and spends his money on drinking. He has a very small concrete room way up on the hill above town and it is quite a vertical walk to get there with the path getting worse the higher you go as less people use that path because their houses are lower on the hill. No lights up there at night and it is a bad climb if you are drunk. So most times, rain or shine, Den's father drinks himself to sleep in the rental pedicab.On my last trip, 3 months ago, Den was there but not around much. He has spare clothes and a shower waiting anytime he wants it at my house, but he does not come around if I am not there. I think, but have not asked.... he has become the sex toy of older men. Which is the usual pattern there. When I met Den and Venus, they were 11 and puberty had not set upon them yet. They were the older ones in their social street kid group. They played together, begged together, swam naked in the ocean every day together and over multiple trips there for me, I saw 'snap shots' of their lives as they got older. As puberty hit Venus, she was showered with attention from the low class motorcycle cab drivers who would allow her to ride with them as they took people around town. Sex was easy for the drivers....I got her and Den into school, but Den was a poor match so he dropped out again. Venus is smarter and does well in school, but misses a lot of time. I found out that the teachers know she has a Kano for a sponsor so they extort small money from her to over look the missing days.... She comes to the house and asks for 'project money' and they goes off on her merry way. The bad influence on her are the other street girls her age that are now selling themselves for 100P or more if they find a rich(er) pinoy for the evening. So they have money for cigarettes and rum, and hang out on the street all night and sleep durring the day. Now that I have bought a house for Venus and her family (less than $500 USD with repairs!) she has her own room and stays there a few nights a week. Once her mother, the GRO has the baby, then if it is not given away, Venus will be forced into the nanny position while mom goes back to Manila. This will get old quick for Venus so I do not know what will happen then. School is over in March and I expect her to finish the 6th grade and that will be the end of her education.There was a bit of jealousy on my last trip as when I was dealing with Marina, Catherine's 14 yr old prostitute sister (thick as a board! refuses to make eye contact, grunts or nods her head in response to my questions) I met another 14 yr old named Jennifer who is also a prostitue. She asked me if I would pay for her to return to school and I said I would. So this makes Marina mad who starts fights with Jennifer and Venus is upset because I 'found' another girl....... Ah! The minds of teenage girls! Marina who pays NO ATTENTION to me at all is mad, and Venus whose life is not impacted in any way by my paying the school fees for another kid (less than $100 a year!) is jealous. I think that Marina is the way she is due to possible sniffing issues as well as she waiting to have to 'pay me' (sex) if I do anything for her, even though I and others there have told her that won't happen she owes me nothing, she is still very distant. An interesting thing about Venus is that maybe 2 trips ago she asked me if she could be my daughter instead of my girl friend! I have not has a 14 yr old girl friend since I was a 14 yr old! So I agreed that I would be a father figure....... hehehehehe I can only imagine the fury of my 52 yr old woman friend there if I said I was dumping her for a 14 yr old! But.... it appears that Venus had considered it. Which makes me wonder if the GRO mom had told Vernus toexplore the possibilities of me becoming her son-in-law....... Since I had know Venus as an 11 yr old and the extent of our relationship was me paying small bills for her, buying her clothes and including her into the social group I am with there, I believe it was a similar relationship like with my own daughters in the US. Sex was not an option until, perhaps her mother wanted a kano in the family.... So on my last trip, there was no issues or mention again. Business as usual....Catherine has other issues in that she is just 8. Mom and older sister are prostitutes, older brother is abusive, dad in prison and she being the youngest bears the weight of any family anger (pecking order logic). She is forced into begging by the older brother when she is not in school. Marina steals things and forces Catherine to sell thm for her and unless I am in Catbalogan, there in no one stopping it. Even though she has been told to come to my house and the family there will feed her and she can sleep there or in the new room, she goes there and just remains quiet and will not tell them what the current problem is.I am soon to return and will stay there for 50+ days. So I hope to get thing settled and Catherine into a routine she will be able to continue when I leave again.

[JJReyes]

Hi Bruce,I have developed an interest in helping Philippine street children. At the present time, this is through small financial contributions and sending balikbayan boxes containing odds & ends to a small non-profit group that is managing a children's shelter in Metro Manila. The long-term end results are unknown. I suppose the children appreciate the occasional hot meals and the medical care provided by nursing students from a nearby university. Your situation is more intriguing because of the direct link between the sponsor and the recipients. It is something to consider if my wife and I decide to relocate to the Philippines in retirement. JJR