A Common Very Odd Behaviour. Any Clues How Come?

[Thomas]

I know what you mean Thomas, but many family simply refuse to acknowledge bad actions of other members of their family.

I kind of understand, because of their "lose face" culture,

but I don't understand why they don't tell them HARD internal in the family.

In the two cases I know close, the family members WORRY very much about the problem, but they still don't tell demands to the extreemly bad behaving sibbling!!!

 

In my family we once confronted, for a much smaller error, my youngest sister and her lazy husband, when they were unfair to their oldest son, and told them that's unacceptable, but in RP families they don't even seem to see that as an option!

[jpbago]

Working in the middle east Thomas and have Indians, Phillipinos, Sri Lankans, Nepalis, Bangladeshi, Kenyan, English, working in the company.  I dont know why but many of the Phillipinos always have family dramas, emergencys and often very poor management of there salarys and funds.............. always demands from home for this or that it seems.

 

Have been in Saudi, UAE and Qatar.......all the same, never problems with other nationalitys but Philipinos constantly asking for cash advances, emergency leave etc.....

 

No idea why

Many of them get money from heaven (OFWs, relatives, or foreigners) so they don't value it as compared if you had to work for money. They sit around playing mah jong or teung-it for 2 days non stop with borrowed money to be paid back by someone else. Men have kids from different women hoping that someday, some of the kids will become an OFW or marry to a foreigner then they will ask for money. It is like a pension to them except they don't pay into it.

[Dougbert]

It is a complicated thing.  I think conflict avoidance also plays a part in the culture.  At least among family members. 

[Fred & Mimi]

Could be their strong faith that lets them forgive all forms of bad behaviour. The same faith also permits lets them get off the hook when they have done something bad

[Old55]

Could be their strong faith that lets them forgive all forms of bad behaviour. The same faith also permits lets them get off the hook when they have done something bad

Its true some who have no real faith will use the Church to do or excuse evil actions.

[Steve GCC]

It is a complicated thing.  I think conflict avoidance also plays a part in the culture.  At least among family members. 

 

I certainly agree with the conflict avoidance part.  Even at work here the Philipinos in Supervisory or Management roles dont like conflict and every disciplinary action they hate taking, rather raise it up the management chain than deal with it

[Tukaram (Tim)]

Part of it could be the attitude I see of "Well, that is just the way it is - what can you do"  And that may be part of the conflict avoidance too?  They accept everything!  I blame the catholic government mostly.  Made good sheep out of them.  Just take your beating, smile, and move on.

 

Sometimes it looks like a strength (like the post typhoon news) but usually it will just keep them downtrodden.

[FlyAway]

"Learned Helplessness"

 

http://www.britannica.com/EBchecked/topic/1380861/learned-helplessness

[Thomas]

It is a complicated thing.  I think conflict avoidance also plays a part in the culture.  At least among family members. 

Yes, that can be the reason.

But it's some odd, Filipins find BIG things OK, but knife stabb people for SMALL reasons   :)

 

Could be their strong faith that lets them forgive all forms of bad behaviour. The same faith also permits lets them get off the hook when they have done something bad

Yes, that can be a part too.

But some odd they don't try to stop them, who GO ON doing the same BIG error.  (As in the examples I know closer, I'm not sure if the sister got more money send through her, keeping them too, at least the wife and sons don't get any money... In the other example the sister go on with the expensive life, which she can't afford, instead of trying to pay back, but in her case there are no more money to take, because she has taken all allready  :)

[jpbago]

 

Could be their strong faith that lets them forgive all forms of bad behaviour. The same faith also permits lets them get off the hook when they have done something bad

Its true some who have no real faith will use the Church to do or excuse evil actions.

 

Like the mafia. Rob, rape, and plunder on Saturday night, then go to church on Sunday.