Face, What Is It?

[Old55]

We have some new members and its been awhile we had a FACE topic. It would be interesting what tips Expats currently living in Philippines would share to do with what FACE is to the average Filipino and to the average Filipina.

More to the point what NOT to say or do that would cause loss of FACE.

ANy good learning experiences in that you caused someone loss of Face and lived through it so far you would share with us?

[Methersgate]

A guy is more likely to kill you if you lose him face than he is if you sleep with his wife.

 

Edited August 2, 2014 by Methersgate

[Tukaram (Tim)]

Face is a false pride.  You can be as much of a dirtbag in private but put on a false friendly front.  And anyone that breaks the image is seen as wrong.  They want to avoid embarrassment or humiliation.  It is, unfortunately, not about any real honor - just image.

[Old55]

If you come across a group of men drinking together what you both say is often true.

Even with good people at times there is a reluctance to admit an error or mistake to not lose face.

Edited August 2, 2014 by Old55

[Methersgate]

This has the effect of making it impossible to admit an error, because of the loss of face.

 

[Dave Hounddriver]

Face is that thing that turns red when you cause someone embarrassment.  If you are perceived to be the cause of their embarrassment they feel they must do something to repay you in kind, such as when you embarrass your gf in front of her family she feels she must screw another guy to equally embarrass you.  Or so it was explained to me, but she may have just been horny.

[Methersgate]

This is a good topic.

 

I have lived In East Asia and with East Asians since I was 32, and I am still damned if I understand "face".

 

Obviously,never rebuke anyone in public (except that the Chinese do this all the time!), never open a present in the presence of the giver, lest momentary disappointment shows in your expression, never do anything that suggests that anyone, especially your hosts, are not wonderful, never criticize the nation itself (natives may do so; you may not)... always show respect to elders...what can we add to this?

 

[Jake]

This is a good topic.

 

I have lived In East Asia and with East Asians since I was 32, and I am still damned if I understand "face".

 

Obviously,never rebuke anyone in public (except that the Chinese do this all the time!), never open a present in the presence of the giver, lest momentary disappointment shows in your expression, never do anything that suggests that anyone, especially your hosts, are not wonderful, never criticize the nation itself (natives may do so; you may not)... always show respect to elders...what can we add to this?

 

Hmmm......let me see -- in a crowded karaoke bar, I'm singing my heart out, drunk and crying over my beer

and someone shouted -- YOU SUCK, get off the stage!  What would a typical Filipino do in front of all those

people?

 

Naturally, I would whip out my colt 49 (mine is bigger than yours) and shoot him dead.  I would then continue

to sing My Way all by myself.  Everybody else left the building but at least my face (ego) remained intact. 

 

Read this -- http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/My_Way_killings 

As of 2007, the song reportedly had been taken off of the playlists of karaoke machines in many bars in

Manila after complaints about out-of-tune renditions of the song resulted in fights and deaths

 

Es mo pun.......saving face.

 

 

[Malcolm Graham]

You get shot just for complaining about the volume

 

http://www.abs-cbnnews.com/nation/metro-manila/08/08/14/man-killed-after-protesting-loud-videoke

 

MANILA - A barangay volunteer was shot dead by a fellow volunteer after he allegedly complained of the latter's loud videoke session in Barangay 255, San Nicolas, Tondo.

The victim, identified as Gener Hermosa, was sleeping when he was shot three times by Eduardo Damayo.

Before the shooting incident, residents said they heard Hermosa complain of the loud videoke session of Damayo.

Resident Roberto Darjuan said the suspect was drunk at the time of the incident.

Darjuan also said the victim and the suspect already had a misunderstanding before the shooting.

"Kasi yung isa ang laging inuutusan ni chairman. Yung isa naman nagselos, parang na-balewala kasi," he said.

Meanwhile, the victim's wife said she could not understand why Damayo would kill her husband over such petty differences.

"Ang dami pa naman naming plano, paano na ang mga pangarap namin," Emily said.

"Sana mangyari sa kanya kung anong ginawa niya sa asawa ko," she added.

Damayo, who was immediately arrested by the police, will be charged with murder.

Barangay captain Arnel Dungo, meanwhile, said they will pursue the case against Damayo even if the suspect is his cousin.

[Old55]

Always smile when you say no but never use the word no.