Jake Posted September 19, 2014 Posted September 19, 2014 (edited) Kuya Jake, I'll have you know marinated bangus tastes awesome with mango waffles. Unfortunately, my uni roomies didn't seem to think the scent of re-fried dried fish with bagoong omelet is breathtakingly yummy. Weird kanos :) Yep, you're right; the cultural differences are much harder to contend with than age. My parents' age didn't really factor much in their marriage, except when my dad received the senior citizen discount at Denny's and my mom didn't. "How come like that? That's not fair! You give me wife of senior citizen discount!" But I digress. "The man should be the protector, be it financially or emotionally" is one of the main cultural takeaway in the Philippines. It doesn't matter if your woman is a young, modern, driven, and successful executive or an older woman from the province; she will want that reassurance that even if she can take care of yourself, you will be there to support her and be with her. This is why some younger women choose to be with older men. Older men tend to be rocks and are more likely to be pragmatic and say, "Okay, let'a deal with it. What should we do?" In contrast, SOME younger men are more, "Whatever. I don't have to deal witj your drama mama ways. I got mah boyz to chill with." Hey girl, I was nodding in agreement until I came upon the sentence which I highlighted for you. Some of us old folks (especially me) are no longer the young stallion we once were. That is part of the age difference but hopefully it's not significant enough to spoil a relationship. Thank god for miracles from Pfizer pharmaceutical for my monthly supply of the blue pill. My marriage to Judy for nearly 29 yrs has been blissful. I have been bless with a very patient and forgiving woman -- she is 15 yrs younger than me. Could that be our fountain of youth.......he, he. Respectfully -- Kuya Jake Edited September 20, 2014 by Jake spil chek Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Negrito Posted September 20, 2014 Author Posted September 20, 2014 When the couple is viewed to be on equal standing intellectually, financially, socially, and etc., the age thing becomes a non-issue. In regards to Big El OP, there are many more obstacles to overcome, one being the cultural differences of the Filipino in general. And that subject has been covered so many times and it's worth more discussions for the newer members in order to prepare themselves. Yep, you're right; the cultural differences are much harder to contend with than age. You guys are just blowing me away with your observations. Although my OP was about the hypocrisy of it all and why it exists, all the points you brought out are connected because really I see no logical support for the prejudice shown by some regarding the issue of age. I don't care if someone is older or younger than me as long as we love each other. Thanks to both of you! :thumbsup: 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldutot Posted September 20, 2014 Posted September 20, 2014 Plain and simple for me. I would take a mature Filipina. I Sow my oats long ago. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Americano Posted September 20, 2014 Posted September 20, 2014 I have experienced first hand what the OP mentioned so I will give my opinion. I was living in the USA when my wife was 19 and I was 59 = 40 years age difference. Women about her same age didn't seem to care but it bothered some middle aged women. I believe it made them feel like older women were not good enough for me, which was a put down to them. Men on the other hand had a different reaction. I believe they were just envious and jealous that they didn't have a very young and beautiful wife too. I didn't say anything to them but my mental reaction was, I'm the grand prize winner. They are just jealous that they didn't win a prize too. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Negrito Posted September 20, 2014 Author Posted September 20, 2014 I have experienced first hand what the OP mentioned so I will give my opinion. I was living in the USA when my wife was 19 and I was 59 = 40 years age difference. Women about her same age didn't seem to care but it bothered some middle aged women. I believe it made them feel like older women were not good enough for me, which was a put down to them. Men on the other hand had a different reaction. I believe they were just envious and jealous that they didn't have a very young and beautiful wife too. I didn't say anything to them but my mental reaction was, I'm the grand prize winner. They are just jealous that they didn't win a prize too. Triple like this! :thumbsup: I can't see you or your wife very well from just your avatar but well enough to know she looks like a beauty and you guys make a handsome couple. :cheersty: 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alby Posted September 21, 2014 Posted September 21, 2014 When the couple is viewed to be on equal standing intellectually, financially, socially, and etc., the age thing becomes a non-issue. In regards to Big El OP, there are many more obstacles to overcome, one being the cultural differences of the Filipino in general. And that subject has been covered so many times and it's worth more discussions for the newer members in order to prepare themselves. ... I don't care if someone is older or younger than me as long as we love each other. Thanks to both of you! :thumbsup: So, love does exist and it's not an illusion? Love is something we thought was there when we were teenagers but now most of us is over 50!! If there was love, why do we have divorces? Didn't the marriage happen out of love? Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Negrito Posted September 21, 2014 Author Posted September 21, 2014 So, love does exist and it's not an illusion? Love is something we thought was there when we were teenagers but now most of us is over 50!! If there was love, why do we have divorces? Didn't the marriage happen out of love? Yes love does exist but people often forget what it truly means or maybe they never understood what it really means and that it's not just a warm feeling in ones heart or mind. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alby Posted September 21, 2014 Posted September 21, 2014 Ok ... Let's say love does exist! If so, would you go through pain knowing that is what will make your loved one happy? Would you accept her be with some one else if that is what she will make her happy and not you? Would you wait??? Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Hounddriver Posted September 21, 2014 Posted September 21, 2014 would you go through pain knowing that is what will make your loved one happy? Yes, but where is it written that one is not really in love unless willing to do that? It sounds more like Martyrdom. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alby Posted September 21, 2014 Posted September 21, 2014 Can we say then everybody defines love differently ? So there is no one and only? :) Let's face it and be honest with ourselves. The most valuable thing one has is himself. If you lose that then nothing else will be worth it. Coz It all starts from within! Almost all Kanos come to the Philippines to either pick a woman THEY like or can retire with one. Why the Philippines? What's so magical about such a helpless and hopeless country? Coz it's one country where the women have very harsh living conditions making those Kanos look like kings! It's a nice thing to feel isn't it? It's ok but one shouldn't be fooling himself. We Kanos (I am one) know the pressures those women are under which makes compromising on a lot of things including age, very possible. But then, we know deep down there is something wrong but we convince ourselves there is no such a thing. How else can we do what WE like? We need to make believe! What the female is going to see is a Kano man (she can brag), richer than many around her (financial stability), can help family (culture) and she will inherit him after he's gone! Now this Kano has it all except age so, she will have a lot of reasons not to see that! Another convincing on her part :) He, on the other hand, know all that but want a young woman who will take care of him in his last leg of living. So we have a deal! Where is love in all this? Does it matter? Me? I don't have a problem with this. It's a mutual agreement that both have signed on it to but, I won't fool myself into thinking that there is love and that's why I am doing it? I say, it's been like this forever and it will not change. As sure as the stars shining above :) Males will forever stay males and females will forever stay females!! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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