Husbands That Go Crazy With Their Money

[El Negrito]

This is a society that loves to show off - for "face". They cannot help themselves. It is an evil combination of Asian "face" and Latin "bella figura" type showing off.  This is compounded by the deep social insecurity of many Filipinos.   It is all very silly but it is not going to change. Facebook allows people to pretend to be much better off than they actually are, so it has got worse.

 

It's the same here in Mexico. Not just with material things but also socially. Many pretend to be nice and put on all these airs of manners. I mean God forbid you don't shake someones hand or say Buenos Dias, even if you don't know them. Yet they will stab you in the back first chance they get. God forbid you catch them in a lie and confront them, they know they lied and the proof is sitting right there yet they will be so offended as to fight you over it. I find it disgusting. And keep in mind this is from someone who LOVES Mexicans and the culture.

[Methersgate]

 

This is a society that loves to show off - for "face". They cannot help themselves. It is an evil combination of Asian "face" and Latin "bella figura" type showing off.  This is compounded by the deep social insecurity of many Filipinos.   It is all very silly but it is not going to change. Facebook allows people to pretend to be much better off than they actually are, so it has got worse.

 

It's the same here in Mexico. Not just with material things but also socially. Many pretend to be nice and put on all these airs of manners. I mean God forbid you don't shake someones hand or say Buenos Dias, even if you don't know them. Yet they will stab you in the back first chance they get. God forbid you catch them in a lie and confront them, they know they lied and the proof is sitting right there yet they will be so offended as to fight you over it. I find it disgusting. And keep in mind this is from someone who LOVES Mexicans and the culture.

 

You will feel quite at home in the Philippines - as we've said before, the two cultures are very close, because the Philippines was, for a couple of centuries, a province of Mexico! 

It's just the same - especially confronting someone caught in a lie. 

[jpbago]

We buy 3 or 4 handbags every year as the girls use them for school bags loaded with books and a change of clothes. If you don't use them regularly, they go rotten with black mold from the moist air (constant rain).

[davewe]

 

The handbags were the major expenditure for friend #2. Just think of the most famous high end brand in the world - and then figure the potential costs.   Again my friend has the money - I suppose. But still - it's hard to imagine.

 

Maybe he is buying her knock offs and not telling her? I have seen some really goooooooooooooooood knock offs.  :lol:

 

Nope. They posted pics outside and inside the store, with the bags, with the saleman, and finally posted pics of the receipt. 

 

Frankly I don't blame the women that much at all. If someone can spends thousands on me I'd take it. I am just surprised that the husbands both spend extravagantly and then post (or let their wives post) the results.

[davewe]

There is another aspect too, which is that the old foreign husband or boyfriend loves to give his young Filipina wife or girl friend money, because it makes her happy, so very often he gives her much too much.

 

Unfortunately it is very often the only thing about him that makes her happy; her love goes to her Filipino "sideline" guy, to whom she is giving most of the money that her foreigner is giving her. She rationalises this as her "sacrificing herself" for her "true love", and the guy just takes the money, brags to his barkadas and screws her when he feels like it.

Yes I certainly fit this well worn dynamic, except in my case my spoiling my wife consists of a $20 shopping spree at H&M :) Guess I am not making that Filipino "sideline" guy too happy :)

Edited September 24, 2014 by davewe

[El Negrito]

Nope. They posted pics outside and inside the store, with the bags, with the saleman, and finally posted pics of the receipt. 

 

Now that's just sad.

[Dave Hounddriver]

my basic feeling is that guys (and their wives) can do whatever they want with their money. It's theirs and not my business.

 

I reluctantly agree.  Reluctantly because I have had to decide to end friendships with foreigner friends who go crazy with letting their wives/gfs spend money like drunken sailors.  Why?  Because my gf sees it all and hears all the bragging and becomes discontented with her lot in life.  She does not say it all the time but her actions say: " She gets to spend all that money foolishly so why can"t I?"  Of course the answer is that not everyone has that amount of money to flaunt but it eats at her so I choose to put distance between the extravagant spenders and my little household.

 

It is sad to me because the girls who get so much money to spend are usually the ones we hear putting down their benefactors and often seeking out sideline romances.  Its almost like proving you are rich means taking on a lover.  But that may just be my own observation with the half dozen couples I have seen in that type of relationship.

[Thomas]

Well. It isn't odd if a poor Filipina have a build up NEED of buying BASIC need things and a LITLE more, which I find OK to spend on,

BUT shopping MORE than that for bragging I will NOT find OK.

I have "warned" my gf I want UGGLY house and car   :mocking:  to reduce the jelousy risk (cheap car, but big house to have much space to be inside during bad weather period.)   And I LIKE to dress similar to farmers and even traditional tribe look   :)

Here is the southern California, I was very uncomfortable when Judy forced me to go to Sunday Mass.  I didn't have

anything to wear.  Well, at least not in the same level of bling-bling I noticed of many Filipino couples showing off their

BMW's and Mercedes.  It was too much 24K gold being worn by a plastic heart.  Another thing why I hated to go -- 

not because my car is an old Honda Accord with bald tires.  I had to avoid the Holy Water.  It would be a dead giveaway

if I burn my forehead again......he, he.

I will bring some of my suits if I will need them for official or business meetings, BUT IF my - future - wife will "force" me to go to church dressed up for bragging, then it's big risk I will dress in my BADEST clothes    :mocking:

But I will buy such special posh shirt wealthier Filipins have, because they suit the weather much better than western suits, so I hope I can use such so I don't need any of my suits.   (I have forgot the name of them now, something starting with B.)

 

There are many wealthy and educated Filipinos, especially among the Chinese-Filipino community. They're the people who control the country. But few foreign pensioners ever meet them. They don't want their daughters marrying an old foreigner, it would be a family disgrace. So we read that "all" Filipinos are this and that. Sweeping generalities; in one ear, out the other.

Around 3/4 of the Filipins I know earn less than 10 000p per montrh. One of the others is high educated and her family is rather powerful. She is - to much  :mocking:  - interested in me, but I doubt her family want her to marry me at least if they see my birth certificate   :lol:   She is nice, but has to bad logic thinking, so we don't suit as married anyway.

 

This is a society that loves to show off - for "face".

Except in SOME situations when I'm depending much of their liking (as with some officials and business)

I try to do the OPPOSITE   =blend in with the farmers.

[jpbago]

One of the others is high educated and her family is rather powerful. She is - to much    - interested in me, but I doubt her family want her to marry me at least if they see my birth certificate     She is nice, but has to bad logic thinking, so we don't suit as married anyway.

 

Highly educated but with too bad logic is from the memorized education system. Listen to me and don't ask questions.

[Methersgate]

 

One of the others is high educated and her family is rather powerful. She is - to much    - interested in me, but I doubt her family want her to marry me at least if they see my birth certificate     She is nice, but has to bad logic thinking, so we don't suit as married anyway.

 

Highly educated but with too bad logic is from the memorized education system. Listen to me and don't ask questions.

 

Very true. This is due to the power distance being large and to the shortage of educational materials.