Planning For The Inevitable

[Bruce]

Well, here is a true story about monthly payments.... My great grandmother died in 1972. Her husband died in 1932, suddenly. He was a plumber and owned his own store with an apartment above it. My great grandmother was a very nice old lady who stayed up all night playing cards. But she had the common sense of a house cat. Before her husband died, he formed a trust with 'the bank' for his wife and 4 living kids.That trust paid all the rent / utilities and related costs up to the late 1960s for my great grand mother. In the late 1960s, the 'trust' was almost gone so it sold the building, a small 3 story innercity residential building with the store on the ground floor, to my uncle who was now the owner of the plumbing business. With that extra money, the trust kept paying the bills for my great grand mother who was now in her late 80s and did so until she died in 1972. Now, this was no large amount of money. But how ever the bank managed it, it did provide basic housing costs for her for 40 years. Started out with 1930s money values.If you look at the basic housing costs in the Philippines, and you fund an annuity or trust with USD /Euro money, it is possible to have your widow live for many years on that money in the Philippines and that same money is out of the reach of her family. My original opinion that once I am dead, I am dead and she can worry about the money any way she wants, still stands. But Lee does have a valid point if you want to plan out things and try to make sure that she has somewhat of an income that she can't blow in a short time.

[Mike S]

Well I haven't posted in a while but this one brought me back for just one ...... talk about some cold dudes ...... don't worry about anything cause you will be dead ....... wow .... what a statement ..... but I guess everyone is entitled to their why of thinking and that is good ........ Just a couple of points ..... as I am sure you are all aware 99% of Filipinos are very generous when it comes to family and 99% of family feel that what ever you have is theirs and don't have the least bit of concern or consents about relieving your wife or girlfriend of all the money or property that you may leave her ....... and you know what???? ... she will oblige them ...... the reason ...... because that is the way they are raised ...... Can you do anything to prevent it ...... probably not ...... whether in one lump sum or in installment payments the family is going to get their share .... if you set it up for her to receive $1000 per month the family will require $899 to survive ..... all kinds of emergencies will crop up and she WILL feel obligated to help out ....... remember the only reason that the family doesn't get more of her money right now is because we control it and can prevent it from happen ... but what after you are gone????? ....... don't think for one single moment that family peer pressure is not going to be a major factor because it will ...... So what is the answer ....... that is the $64,000 question ........ I don't have it .... but a monthly allotment would slow it down a bit and at least make the money go further ....... but no guarantee that your love will ever get all the money you leave her ..... IMHO

[Mr Lee]

Well I haven't posted in a while but this one brought me back for just one ...... talk about some cold dudes ...... don't worry about anything cause you will be dead ....... wow .... what a statement ..... but I guess everyone is entitled to their why of thinking and that is good ........ Just a couple of points ..... as I am sure you are all aware 99% of Filipinos are very generous when it comes to family and 99% of family feel that what ever you have is theirs and don't have the least bit of concern or consents about relieving your wife or girlfriend of all the money or property that you may leave her ....... and you know what???? ... she will oblige them ...... the reason ...... because that is the way they are raised ...... Can you do anything to prevent it ...... probably not ...... whether in one lump sum or in installment payments the family is going to get their share .... if you set it up for her to receive $1000 per month the family will require $899 to survive ..... all kinds of emergencies will crop up and she WILL feel obligated to help out ....... remember the only reason that the family doesn't get more of her money right now is because we control it and can prevent it from happen ... but what after you are gone????? ....... don't think for one single moment that family peer pressure is not going to be a major factor because it will ...... So what is the answer ....... that is the $64,000 question ........ I don't have it .... but a monthly allotment would slow it down a bit and at least make the money go further ....... but no guarantee that your love will ever get all the money you leave her ..... IMHO

Mike, I think you are right on with your post and that is why I started this thread, in hopes that someone might have some answers. While I think both your wife and mine are smart enough to resist to some degree, I do think that the pressure might be too much for most and that is why I think it would be better if the money was spread out, at least that way it would not be all gone in a very short time and at least they would have some left for food or the necessities of life. I know my wife would never give up what it might take for her to survive but she might give up everything beyond that amount, so how to set up monthly money coming in? An annuity in the states might be the answer but how would she get the funds? Would it be deposited into an account for her or mailed to her, we all know how the postal system in the Philippines works and I am not so sure it is a whole lot better in the states because quite of bit of my mail never gets to me and I get other peoples mail on a regular basis, so what is the answer, maybe an annuity in the Philippines? Would those be secure and what amount might they be insured for? So many questions and so few answers at this point and I am really sorry to hear that some people would actually think that their wife would be able to handle her family, or not care.

[Jollygoodfellow]

Well I haven't posted in a while but this one brought me back for just one ...... talk about some cold dudes ...... don't worry about anything cause you will be dead ....... wow .... what a statement ..... but I guess everyone is entitled to their why of thinking and that is good ........ Just a couple of points ..... as I am sure you are all aware 99% of Filipinos are very generous when it comes to family and 99% of family feel that what ever you have is theirs and don't have the least bit of concern or consents about relieving your wife or girlfriend of all the money or property that you may leave her ....... and you know what???? ... she will oblige them ...... the reason ...... because that is the way they are raised ...... Can you do anything to prevent it ...... probably not ...... whether in one lump sum or in installment payments the family is going to get their share .... if you set it up for her to receive $1000 per month the family will require $899 to survive ..... all kinds of emergencies will crop up and she WILL feel obligated to help out ....... remember the only reason that the family doesn't get more of her money right now is because we control it and can prevent it from happen ... but what after you are gone????? ....... don't think for one single moment that family peer pressure is not going to be a major factor because it will ...... So what is the answer ....... that is the $64,000 question ........ I don't have it .... but a monthly allotment would slow it down a bit and at least make the money go further ....... but no guarantee that your love will ever get all the money you leave her ..... IMHO

Mike, I think you are right on with your post and that is why I started this thread, in hopes that someone might have some answers. While I think both your wife and mine are smart enough to resist to some degree, I do think that the pressure might be too much for most and that is why I think it would be better if the money was spread out, at least that way it would not be all gone in a very short time and at least they would have some left for food or the necessities of life. I know my wife would never give up what it might take for her to survive but she might give up everything beyond that amount, so how to set up monthly money coming in? An annuity in the states might be the answer but how would she get the funds? Would it be deposited into an account for her or mailed to her, we all know how the postal system in the Philippines works and I am not so sure it is a whole lot better in the states because quite of bit of my mail never gets to me and I get other peoples mail on a regular basis, so what is the answer, maybe an annuity in the Philippines? Would those be secure and what amount might they be insured for? So many questions and so few answers at this point and I am really sorry to hear that some people would actually think that their wife would be able to handle her family, or not care.

I guess the problem with this subject is the scenarios,for example;are we talking about a wife who is living in a western country and has for many years. Are we talking about a wife who is living in the Philippines surrounded by family?How westernized is the wife?I think it will make a difference as to the circumstances of the widow and the way she will survive without you.

[ancienrocka]

Lee, you wanted facts and these are mine.We live on a small pension from the UK - not enough to live the rich life but we do not starve.When I'm gone my wife will receive half that amount for the rest of her life, she will probably need to work but not too hard.Can I get her to accept this and show her how to access the money when i go - NO - she shuts off her mind to the fact that her life will go on without me. This to me is the difference between the love of a Filipna and the love of a western woman.Paul

[Mr Lee]

Lee, you wanted facts and these are mine.We live on a small pension from the UK - not enough to live the rich life but we do not starve.When I'm gone my wife will receive half that amount for the rest of her life, she will probably need to work but not too hard.Can I get her to accept this and show her how to access the money when i go - NO - she shuts off her mind to the fact that her life will go on without me. This to me is the difference between the love of a Filipna and the love of a western woman.Paul

Glad Elsa will at least get half of yours, my pension stops totally when I die and Nila will have to wait 19 more years at this point due to age difference until she could get widows benefits off US SS and that is if there even is SS when that time comes or if they have not increased the age by then as they have done for my full retirement from 65 to 66.5 yrs old.Good planning is important IMO and that is what I am trying to do.

[Bruce]

Lee, you wanted facts and these are mine.We live on a small pension from the UK - not enough to live the rich life but we do not starve.When I'm gone my wife will receive half that amount for the rest of her life, she will probably need to work but not too hard.Can I get her to accept this and show her how to access the money when i go - NO - she shuts off her mind to the fact that her life will go on without me. This to me is the difference between the love of a Filipna and the love of a western woman.Paul

Hey Paul.... Not wishing you a 'Michael Jacjson' here... but ... ah.... well... How do the Bloody Olde Merry English pension overseers watch you guys? You know, if you happen to fall face first into your plate of fish parts.... whilst in the Philippines, just how long would the widow be able to access your full pension before the 'pension authorities' found out you were dead?I have talked to Lee's wife about this for years. Used to be she would not even consider it. But lately..... whenever they are in the US and he coughs more than 3 times in a row, she hits the speed dial for the travel agent! I think she is beginning to see the light! hehehehehehehe

[ancienrocka]

I don't know is the answer - despite my outward appearance I am not yet old enough to get a pension from the UK government. My pension comes from a company I worked for many years ago, they get me to sign to say I'm alive about every 2-3 years - just need to photocopy my passport and sign a form. Elsa is busy practicing my signature as I write!!

Edited June 28, 2009 by ancienrocka

[Bruce]

I don't know is the answer - despite my outward appearance I am not yet old enough to get a pension from the UK government. My pension comes from a company I worked for many years ago, they get me to sign to say I'm alive about every 2-3 years - just need to photocopy my passport and sign a form. Elsa is busy practicing my signature as I write!!

Funny that you should mention that your wife is practising your signature. My one daughter has been signing my name since she was about 8. My 'signature' is on quite a few school papers. Every once in a while, she tells me that if the school calls, I signed the paper and everything is OK. I ask her is there is something that I, as a parent should know about and she always assures me that she has things under control..... I really don't see what all the fuss is about parenting.... It really seems to be easy to me!

[Mik]

1. We lived in the US until my wife could get her US citizenship. She is a dual-citizen and thus can easily travel to the US to work.2. She will get a small lump sum payout from my government life insurance.3. When I took early retirement from the post office I set up a survivor annuity. She will get 30% from my modest civil service pension. 4. Our house and lot are paid for.