i am bob Posted February 15, 2015 Posted February 15, 2015 OK, so I'm the one rushing things and pushing for marriage! I'll be 57 in 3 days and she's going to be 22 in May... Some of you are thinking I'm an evil man robbing the cradle but that would be your problem, not mine! To me, she is the absolute of perfection! Not only is she amazingly beautiful but she is also very mature, educated, funny, good with money, loves her mom, and loves me! She is also very traditional in deference to her mom... Chaperones, no making out in public, permission to marry and a (too) long engagement... Though I have a feeling that last one may go by the wayside when she gets back from Manila... If it was my decision only that mattered? We'd be living in sin or eloped my first week here... So, who's rushing things? 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hey Steve Posted February 15, 2015 Posted February 15, 2015 (edited) Bob, isn't it true the most important thing about being a couple is in how they treat each other and love each other and all that comes with it? Many people (in the West) seem to focus on age difference rather than a much, much more critical issue, that being abuse. Good for you, I say, Bob! I'm sure she is your princess and I wish you BOTH all the happiness you have looked for. I know the source of negative opinions is a whole other topic, Bob, but I like the fact that so many here refuse to be directed by those groups to live according to their standards. Edited February 15, 2015 by Hey Steve 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack Peterson Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 So, who's rushing things? " Life! is not a rehearsal, It's for Living. Live it! " :thumbsup: Morning All, JP :tiphat: :morning1: 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Hounddriver Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 So, who's rushing things? Did you read my post 2 in this thread? I like you Bob. This is one of the very few times that I sincerely hope I am wrong with that post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i am bob Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 So, who's rushing things? Did you read my post 2 in this thread? I like you Bob. This is one of the very few times that I sincerely hope I am wrong with that post. No problem, Dave! Our original plan was at least a year engagement so we could do the traditional things her mom really wants to see and take part in.. . She's the last of the unmarried (except for a brother who is gay) so it's mom's last chance to experience her children growing up the way she drempt! So far, the rest had more modern engagements... Meet, kiss, move in together, have babies, get married... I'm trying to take that time for her mom... She's really a great woman who gave up a lot over the years for her children... So mom does deserve at least one of her children to honor her this way... If anything, I will be the reason mom's heart gets broken... But I'm trying to slow down! :) 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack Peterson Posted February 16, 2015 Posted February 16, 2015 Our original plan was at least a year engagement :unsure: Barring Divorce or an untimely and sad Death my Uncle would say. " A long Engagement means a shorter Marriage" Think, about it! Then Smile :) JP :tiphat: 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thomas Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 isn't it true the most important thing about being a couple is in how they treat each other and love each other Yes, AND if their personalities and goals can suit each other, because if one have to adjust to much, then it's problem with happiness for that person, while the other person perhaps BELIEVE everything is perfect. Several married have got suprised when they believed both were happy, when the other suddenly tell they want divorce/separation...E g not so good suiting if /one want to live calm rural and the other want to have parties at home in city /one want to save and the other want to spend and borrow to live luxurious /one want no kids, while the other want at least 10... :lol: 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
UnCheckedOther Posted February 20, 2015 Posted February 20, 2015 Bob, congratulations! Who cares if you're 57 and if she's 22 as long as you love and respect each other? I know that you're getting antsy about getting married now, but in the meantime, maybe you could talk to Av's mom about family or cultural traditions that she would love to see at your wedding. Of course it'll be Av's and your big day and your wants are paramount, but including your MIL in parts of the wedding planning means that it will be more meaningful. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
i am bob Posted February 21, 2015 Posted February 21, 2015 Bob, congratulations! Who cares if you're 57 and if she's 22 as long as you love and respect each other? I know that you're getting antsy about getting married now, but in the meantime, maybe you could talk to Av's mom about family or cultural traditions that she would love to see at your wedding. Of course it'll be Av's and your big day and your wants are paramount, but including your MIL in parts of the wedding planning means that it will be more meaningful. You've been reading my mind! Hehe! Exactly what i was posing to do! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrettGC Posted February 21, 2015 Posted February 21, 2015 In a word to answer the OP's question, no. It may take a little to get to know someone, but after a few dates, and they consider you their's, that's it as far as they're concerned. In my experience, filipinas don't have a concept of "just dating" without a commitment; you're their boyfriend or not. Very double-edged sword and the blade only ever cuts one way (ouch)! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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