At What Point In Time Do Hand Over Control. Financial?

[chris49]

As to a few of you who say NEVER, and I know my good friend MOGO 51, a nice man and straightforward like myself, is one of them. But MOG doesn't live in the Philippines so put an asterisk on that.

 

Sorry guys, we all say that time to time, but in reality, in practice, it will not work out. You must show some form of generosity otherwise run the risk of being called kariput, or downright mean.

 

It would be like going to a small restaurant or barber shop where the normal tip is 20-30 pesos. And you leave them only 5  pesos. That kind of stuff is bad form here especially for a foreigner.

Edited May 6, 2015 by chris49

[Tukaram (Tim)]

Well I have only been here 2.5 years.  But so far I have bought 1 lechon pig, and I forget the occasion - and I volunteered (because I had never had it before).   But why would I pay for someone elses birthday?   It is just not gonna happen.  They can call me whatever they want. 

 

And now that my wife gets the monthly allowance and has found that it does not last... she is definitely on my side when we say no.

[Methersgate]

I seem to have derailed this thread with my reference to 10K birthday parties. But K's extended family are peasant farmers and what they like is a good traditional "blow out". I am obviously the richest member of the clan, (which does not say much for anyone else!) and so, to some extent, I am expected to "provide" for such occasions if I am around. They don't ask for any regular financial support and would be offended if I were to offer, but a good party (as K says, "In the province, invite twelve and cook for fifty!) is a different thing.  

 

My real point is that one does better to hand over a stipulated amount and leave the recipient to budget.

[i am bob]

Mr Methersgate, you bring up another point that many here are missing...

 

Every single one of us is living in a different situation...  Some with family, some away from family...  Some with families that have money and others have family that are basically poor...  Some have family that lay about and others have family that work hard for lots of dollars and then again some work hard for only a few pesos!  What and how much we contribute to family events will differ for each and every one of us!

 

And, to get back on track with this thread....   The same will be true for our beloved better halfs...  How they want to interact financially with their families will make a difference to how they will budget the funds in-house...  This is something each and every one of us needs to be aware of so that we can help our wives with this so that we ourselves don't have to go without - inadvertently or otherwise!

 

:mocking:  :tiphat:  :thumbsup:

[Vince Runza]

The original question was regarding turning over financial control. That begs the question: do you know how to control your own finances?

 

My late wife handled bookkeeping and other financial chores in her work. Yet, she was quite able to put herself into a financial hole by blithely ignoring how much she was spending, personally, when she wanted something. Lack of impulse control trumped budgeting.

 

We tried an experiment. We started tracking every cent we spent, including pocket change. I'm a master of living within a set budget. She, however, never did permit herself to say, "No", when she wanted something. As an aside, I just tested myself. I knew, exactly, how much money was in my pockets (including denominations).

 

If you're going to turn over your finances to a partner that does not have the experience of tracking spending, expect problems. If you are lousy at picking a partner who will NEVER live within a budget, you might want to set up some kind of monthly allotment (like a trust fund), if you become incapacitated. Otherwise, your partner will blow through everything, leaving you both in a hole you will not get out of. :as-if:

[Methersgate]

That begs the question: do you know how to control your own finances?  

 

I have a friend who is a partner in one of the biggest global law firms, specialising in tax. He is absolutely brilliant at his job - and had tha bailiffs round to his house last week because he had forgotten tom file his own tax return!