Are We Truly Serious With The Relationship Advice We Give?

[Tukaram (Tim)]

Every situation is different and each of us reacts differently.  Coming to a forum for advice is just a way to think about your problem out loud... and take all answers with a grain of salt.

 

You never get the whole story so it is hard to give a good answer.

 

Someone recently asked my advice (his first mistake ha ha!) about family and finances.  He gave some details but I am sure there were many I did not get.  But long story short I told him if I had to choose between supporting the girlfriend's family or paying for a back surgery I needed... no question.  My health comes first.  And if the girlfriend does not understand that.... cut her loose because she ain't wife material.  From the details he gave me that is what I would do, and what I would recommend.

 

I made sure and told him what works for me may not work for everyone.  If my wife started siding with her family on financial issues I would have no problem leaving her... and she knows that.  (but in all honesty she chose "us" over "them" in financial debates before I married her)      :tiphat:

[i am bob]

Great answers, guys! But what I really want to know is this: If you find yourself in a situation, would YOU follow the same advise that YOU give others?

:D

[Jack Peterson]

If you find yourself in a situation, would YOU follow the same advise that YOU give others?

 

 

Tongue in cheek Bob  Would you?

[i am bob]

Sorry, Dave! A get together would be great but I'm gonna be busy the next little while... My Special Someone is finally coming home from Manila in a couple weeks and I don't think I'm going to see much of anyone else for a while! :D

[i am bob]

If you find yourself in a situation, would YOU follow the same advise that YOU give others?

 

 

Tongue in cheek Bob thinking man.jpg Would you?

Yes, I would!

But then I don't normally suggest that people walk away but find out the whole story first!

:D

[Jack Peterson]

But then I don't normally suggest that people walk away but find out the whole story first!

 

I think that is correct thing to do is. All to many times, any of us give advice based on facts that either keep changing or are added to at a later date. I agree that any of us should where at all possible wait util the whole story is known. Difficult but........... :thumbsup: 

 

JP :tiphat:  

[Dave Hounddriver]

My Special Someone is finally coming home from Manila in a couple weeks

 

Would love to meet her too, Bob.  Sounds like you and her have a great relationship and maybe she could give us some relationship advice here too.  Is she already a member?  Maybe you could get her signed when she gets there and YES we want pictures  :cheersty:   :dance:  :3_8_14[1]:

[Old55]

 

Should YOU (the member reading this) ever find yourself in this situation in your CURRENT relationship, would you still follow the same advice you would give others?

 

Yes.  Been there done that.  Lots of times.  Lots of relationships.  But then, the advice I give to others who have had only one relationship (that they speak of) is not taken so that's their business.  But giving relationship advice to others when one only has one experience to judge by seems silly to me.  Unless that relationship truly is perfect and so that person wants to give everyone else advice on how to find a perfect one for themselves.

 

But this is truly food for thought.  One of these days the forum needs to have a get together in Davao so we can all meet up and discuss the meaning of life and relationships.  Have you got time to organize such an event Bob?  If the timing was right I'd take a flight there.  I have not yet been to Davao so it would be great to come meet up with all you southern boys.

 

If I make a suggestion or give an opinion for the most part it would be what I would do in that situation.

 

Next March and I will attend.

Edited May 23, 2015 by Old55
update

[BrettGC]

I'll comment on this soon, as some of you know, I've done a lot of "book learnin'" with regards to this, I've experienced life so have that perspective as well, and there's massive disparities but there's also much to be said for the theory too.  Suffice it to say, there is no right or wrong.  If you have the emotional tools to cope with whatever comes your way, well done.  If you don't because it's new to your experience don't be afraid to ask for advice.  The bottom line is, if it has meaning for you, then it's important.  As I said, more later. 

[lonewolf]

one I didn t give advice because I didn t have all the facts, two I d prefer to talk directly to the person so I could know the person and the so three I d trying asking questions to help them to sort their feeling and clarify whats happening to them, four the main thing in this situation is possible danger to him and her and if me I would try to protect myself and my special other. bymaking changes so there is less chance of crossing paths with the ex again, but I d try to be aware whats happening to our relationship also