Asking For Cash/help

[chris49]

Right Steve, it's all individual and it's all learn as you go.

 

I have helped them, the in laws, a lot. You know daily food and sundries like rice will add up. Yet, I have heard through Gina is they still call me "Kariput"...mean.  Such things a "keep the change from 100", when buying a single item, which I stopped long time ago. But mother-in-law will still try.

 

One of the family angles is to try to figure out at the beginning of the month how much money we have. So Gina confuses them by giving misleading info, eg our pension was late, or we only withdrew enough money to pay the bills plus one weeks expenses. Or she let's the big bag of rice get empty while reserving a 2nd supply for our house only. They will either have to buy or maybe in season, go to the field to get some. When everything is provided they don't go.

 

It's ongoing mate, and despite what you have posted so far, you have not heard most of it yet.

 

Another irritating Filipino trait is for them to try to pinpoint how much is our income. What they don't realise is that for a decent pension, we spent 40 or more years working for that and in the earlier years doing hard work. They think a pension is something that just magically appears never looking at the hard years we spent earning it.

 

Rant is over, thanks.

[stevewool]

Like you say the cash we earn and are earning is over many many years of working or saving and it must be the same all over the world, work hard save hard and nobody will look after you when you get old, its all down to yourself,

But then you hear about the culture in the Philippines, maybe this was like good old England many years ago, great grandparents , grandparents, mothers , fathers daughters and even grand children lived together helped each other and supported each other,

Wow thats just what i would like and in you go both feet first,

Suddenly  its not like that, its just like where you have just left, the only difference is your money seems to go that bit further in the Phils thats if you spend it right, and keep it tight too

Yes i have been burnt a few times and burnt bad just the once , silly me but i have got past that,

Emma has said many times its hard here in England and they dont understand at all, I here the tuts and the sighs when she is talking to family and you can tell when there are problems, i do wait until she wants to tell me ,

Would i change her not a chance , the family , let me think on that for a while :mocking:

[Methersgate]

We are the other way round: K thinks I am far too soft hearted and she has taken charge of any financial dealings I might have with her family or anyone else in the Philippines. Her answer to almost all requests is NO, but she did suggest that we give 6K to one of her sisters, a farmer's wife, who by the way had NOT asked for anything, for dental work. Of course. I said "yes".

 

But K is not here in England yet; she has just submitted everything for the visa, so now we wait and hope... 

[sonjack2847]

After reading about all the refugees coming to Europe i will say that people here and anywhere else who sit and wait for a donation from relatives abroad your days are numbered. Soon there will be hardly any OFWs or any other workers from abroad. Same for the US and any other western country just my opinion.

[stevewool]

ON and on it goes, my poor Ems was awake half the night wondering what to do,

I got home from work and Ems is showing me the messages from her sister in law, going on now for 5 days, and all Ems replies was in English to her,

Every time Ems answered her there was another plea, i told Ems she is reeling you in Ems , just be careful,

The last words from her her today is other then the kida are poorly and her own heart condition and having no work but is afraid to ask her husband because she dont what to upset him while working abroad,and the kids have not gone to school today, she is now being kick out of the house,

All this could be true but then again it may not,

The being kicked out of the house got my ears pricked up though,

Is that the next great plan lets move back into the house we have just had built,

You dont want to think the worst but you cant help it sometimes

[stevewool]

After reading about all the refugees coming to Europe i will say that people here and anywhere else who sit and wait for a donation from relatives abroad your days are numbered. Soon there will be hardly any OFWs or any other workers from abroad. Same for the US and any other western country just my opinion.

Wow, thats gave me a great idea, i may start sending messages to all the family over in the Phills asking for help because we have none because we have to pay for these migrants ,

Do you recon i may have many takers

[Thomas]

ON and on it goes, my poor Ems was awake half the night wondering what to do,

I got home from work and Ems is showing me the messages from her sister in law, going on now for 5 days, and all Ems replies was in English to her,

Every time Ems answered her there was another plea, i told Ems she is reeling you in Ems , just be careful,

The last words from her her today is other then the kida are poorly and her own heart condition and having no work but is afraid to ask her husband because she dont what to upset him while working abroad,and the kids have not gone to school today, she is now being kick out of the house,

All this could be true but then again it may not,

The being kicked out of the house got my ears pricked up though,

Is that the next great plan lets move back into the house we have just had built,

You dont want to think the worst but you cant help it sometimes

It CAN be true, she don't want to worry her OFW husband about a heart problem,

BUT it would be realy odd if she wouldn't tell him BEFORE they were kicked out...

This make I asume ALL are lies...   :mocking:

[chris49]

ON and on it goes, my poor Ems was awake half the night wondering what to do,

I got home from work and Ems is showing me the messages from her sister in law, going on now for 5 days, and all Ems replies was in English to her,

Every time Ems answered her there was another plea, i told Ems she is reeling you in Ems , just be careful,

The last words from her her today is other then the kida are poorly and her own heart condition and having no work but is afraid to ask her husband because she dont what to upset him while working abroad,and the kids have not gone to school today, she is now being kick out of the house,

All this could be true but then again it may not,

The being kicked out of the house got my ears pricked up though,

Is that the next great plan lets move back into the house we have just had built,

You dont want to think the worst but you cant help it sometimes

Big drama, big scene being played out here.

A good chance for you Steve, to show what a nice man you are. Send her 200 quid, that's about 13-14k pesos. Tell Ems it's your decision because you don't like seeing her so upset.

This is getting really personal, but I would tell Ems that if she decides to help them in the future from her own salary, she must do it without disturbing the family savings or budget.

[Jack Peterson]

This is getting really personal,

 

For me, it would be time to start talking to the husband Direct. OFW or Not, they are HIS responsibility not yours and Ems.

[chris49]

Good Jack. But these are Filipino's they are not so direct with each other as they are with us.

But it's good that Steve is getting a cross section of answers. Tough situation for his wife really, but I fall back on the fact that she is working. A situation not unlike thousand's of other Filipina's who have immigrated, but still face pressure from back home.