Finding The Right Filipina Part 2

[Vince Runza]

Perhaps Jack would find it better to Ignore my posts altogether, and devote his time to contributing to the 2016 edition of this book:

Edited December 18, 2015 by Vince Runza

[Jack Peterson]

Perhaps Jack would find it better to Ignore my posts altogether, and devote his time to contributing to the 2016 edition of this book:

 

Far too busy annoying people and having a life of Fun.

[Vince Runza]

Jack, Vince is quite right - I asked his advice on a specific point and he very kindly gave it.

 

K's answer is nice and clear and consistent - and honest. She never wanted to have children, but she had an "accident". She decided then and there to be the best mother to her boy that she could be. She is utterly contemptuous of Filipinas who dump their kids on their mothers. She  is marrying me to give her son the best future that she can give him. Her part of the deal is to be a good wife to me. The fact that we get on very well together is nice, but it is not the heart of the matter.

 

Of course my ego would be stroked if she told me that she is madly in love with me, but I would be a fool to believe that a very pretty and clever young woman could not find someone nearer her own age to fall in love with.

 

She is great company, a good cook (a bonus!) and if we walk down the street arm in arm the women go green and men's tongues hang out (she is well aware of this and plays up to it) which strokes my ego just as well.  

 

Edited to add:

 

I like sailing, motorcycling, camping and scrambling up the odd mountain. Experience suggests that K is "a good man to go into the jungle with". Coming down Mount Kanlaon last December she twisted her ankle, and did the last six thousand feet down with a stick - never a squeak or a word of complaint.   

 

So maybe I got the right Filipina for me!

This is the heart of the matter: finding the right Filipina for you. It's up to her to decide if you're the right man for her. That means you need to be honest, first with yourself, and with the women you meet.

 

Just because "a very pretty and clever young woman could...find someone nearer her own age to fall in love with," does not mean she will not fall madly in love with you, over time. Just keep probing her for what's important to her. Show her you know and understand. Oh, yeah, kiss her, often, and thoroughly.

[Jake]

 

Jack, Vince is quite right - I asked his advice on a specific point and he very kindly gave it.

 

K's answer is nice and clear and consistent - and honest. She never wanted to have children, but she had an "accident". She decided then and there to be the best mother to her boy that she could be. She is utterly contemptuous of Filipinas who dump their kids on their mothers. She  is marrying me to give her son the best future that she can give him. Her part of the deal is to be a good wife to me. The fact that we get on very well together is nice, but it is not the heart of the matter.

 

Of course my ego would be stroked if she told me that she is madly in love with me, but I would be a fool to believe that a very pretty and clever young woman could not find someone nearer her own age to fall in love with.

 

She is great company, a good cook (a bonus!) and if we walk down the street arm in arm the women go green and men's tongues hang out (she is well aware of this and plays up to it) which strokes my ego just as well.  

 

Edited to add:

 

I like sailing, motorcycling, camping and scrambling up the odd mountain. Experience suggests that K is "a good man to go into the jungle with". Coming down Mount Kanlaon last December she twisted her ankle, and did the last six thousand feet down with a stick - never a squeak or a word of complaint.   

 

So maybe I got the right Filipina for me!

This is the heart of the matter: finding the right Filipina for you. It's up to her to decide if you're the right man for her. That means you need to be honest, first with yourself, and with the women you meet.

 

Just because "a very pretty and clever young woman could...find someone nearer her own age to fall in love with," does not mean she will not fall madly in love with you, over time. Just keep probing her for what's important to her. Show her you know and understand. Oh, yeah, kiss her, often, and thoroughly.

 

Hey Dr Love,

 

Sounds like solid advice for universal code of conduct when dating women.  However, it could be an eye opener when you arrive and finally have boots (or whatever) on the ground in trying to hook up with a Filipina.  I feel they deserve to be recognized not from Venus but perhaps one of the moons from Saturn, like Europa.....he,  he.  

 

Just keep probing her.  Now that, I can identify with......he, he.

[Vince Runza]

perhaps one of the moons from Saturn, like Europa.....he, he.

 

Dude, you're lost! Europa is a moon of Jupiter. Now, if you want a Saturnian lady, Enceladus is fairly unladylike. She squirts!

[virginprune]

Is this thread about sex education in the 3rd grade? If anybody remotely needs this sort of relationship advice I suggest you stick with porn and a hanky!!

[Hey Steve]

Vince, I am not critical of you as a person to be clear-but I know opposing points of view regarding content (yes, content) are acceptable here so as to make that distinction. So from my point of view, as I speak only for myself, these handbooks, pamphlets, whatever you may want to call it, might cater to a much, much, much difference audience than seasoned folks here married to filipinas-with wisdom beyond mine, I must say, who have raised families and so forth and have a deep understanding of the dynamics that go into their particular relationship with their Filipina partners -that being the vast majority here on this site. I think with respect to young men barely out of their teens arriving for the first time-wide eyed and innocent in every way, this thread may (yes, may) have some sort of value to them. Again, it's just my take of the content-nothing personal-but transparency is always a healthy thing. All the best in your continuation of this thread.

[Vince Runza]

Vince, I am not critical of you as a person to be clear-but I know opposing points of view regarding content (yes, content) are acceptable here so as to make that distinction. So from my point of view, as I speak only for myself, these handbooks, pamphlets, whatever you may want to call it, might cater to a much, much, much difference audience than seasoned folks here married to filipinas-with wisdom beyond mine, I must say, who have raised families and so forth and have a deep understanding of the dynamics that go into their particular relationship with their Filipina partners -that being the vast majority here on this site. I think with respect to young men barely out of their teens arriving for the first time-wide eyed and innocent in every way, this thread may (yes, may) have some sort of value to them. Again, it's just my take of the content-nothing personal-but transparency is always a healthy thing. All the best in your continuation of this thread.

I respect your observations. Keep in mind, there's one subset of men, coming to the Philippines, who won't be young men. They'll be divorced/widowed/never married, but who have limited recent experience with dating, romance, etc. It is for their benefit that this database of knowledge from members (not just me) will be most helpful. A smart man learns from his mistakes. A wise man learns from the mistakes of others.

 

The information here is definitely NOT geared towards sex-pats, or other predators. It's for those men who will be surprised at how desirable they have become to so many attractive young women, and need an anchor in the stormy sea of love. One of the worst things a man might do is latch on to the first attractive woman who shows some interest in him. One of the best things to do is come prepared, and take his time. Agreed?

[Hey Steve]

Well, I've already given my take completely and don't feel a need to add anything further. Again...wishing you well on this whole thing

[Methersgate]

I respect your observations. Keep in mind, there's one subset of men, coming to the Philippines, who won't be young men. They'll be divorced/widowed/never married, but who have limited recent experience with dating, romance, etc. It is for their benefit that this database of knowledge from members (not just me) will be most helpful. A smart man learns from his mistakes. A wise man learns from the mistakes of others.

The information here is definitely NOT geared towards sex-pats, or other predators. It's for those men who will be surprised at how desirable they have become to so many attractive young women, and need an anchor in the stormy sea of love. One of the worst things a man might do is latch on to the first attractive woman who shows some interest in him. One of the best things to do is come prepared, and take his time. Agreed?

There are a lot of people in that group and it is wonderful to see how foolish many of us can be.

a story to illustrate the point - a true and recent one...

K attended the CFO in Manila for the required briefing and interview. K smokes, and during a break in the proceedings she sneaked outside for a cigarette. Standing about twenty feet away with their backs to her, unaware of her presence, were two other Filipinas, chatting in Bisaya.

"I'm really tired", said the first. "It was my shift last night and I didn't get a customer!"

"I'm really going to miss the j0b when I go to Germany!" said the other.

Keep in mind that these two ladies of negotiable affection had already got their visas...