Jobert Sucaldito Hospitalized After An Encouter With ... A Cucumber

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Mike S
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Hey folks you can't make this up .... or can you .... I have no website to paste a URL to so this may just be scuttle-butt ..... take it for what it is worth ....

 

 

 

Showbiz talk show host Jobert Sucaldito is recovering at the Capitol Medical Center in Quezon City after a successful emergency surgery to remove a large piece of cucumber that got stuck in his rectum, according to reports.
 
Sucaldito, one of the hosts of ABS-CBN's The Buzz, reportedly met with the accident Sunday night and was rushed to the hospital after complaining of extreme pain in his bottom.
 
X-rays subsequently revealed that a broken piece of cucumber, about five inches in length, had gotten lodged into the lower end of his large intestine.
 
It was not immediately clear how the cucumber got there.
 
The surgeons who operated on Sucaldito were tight-lipped and refused to discuss his case with media, citing doctor-patient confidentiality. Oddly enough, they all looked like they were trying vainly to keep from laughing and refused to look reporters in the eye.
 
Members of Sucaldito's household who declined to be named said they recovered the other half of the cucumber, also five inches in length, in Sucaldito's bedroom.
 
They said it had bite marks and was in a soggy state.
 
Besides the cucumber, they said they also found a bottle of Johnson's baby oil, pictures of scantily clad men, and lots of tissue paper.â€
 
Reached by phone, Sucaldito said he is fine and will be discharged from hospital soon. He explained that it was all an accident.
 
Gumagawa kasi ako ng salad. Napaupo ako dun sa chair e meron palang pipino dun na patayo ang pusisyon. Basta, mabilis kasi ang mga pangyayari (I was making a salad. I sat on a chair but there was a cucumber there in an upright position. Everything just happened so fast), he said.
 
In a related development, a group of vegan Filipinos is reportedly thinking of filing an abuse complaint against Sucaldito for allegedly molesting a harmless and defenseless vegetable.
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jpbago
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So that is why I cannot find any vegetables here. I have been looking in the wrong places.

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Old55
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This may have happened or was an urban legend, anyway the story started in 2013 just another facebook thing?

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Jack Peterson
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Hey folks you can't make this up .... or can you .... I have no website to paste a URL to so this may just be scuttle-butt ..... take it for what it is worth ....

 

 

 

Showbiz talk show host Jobert Sucaldito is recovering at the Capitol Medical Center in Quezon City after a successful emergency surgery to remove a large piece of cucumber that got stuck in his rectum, according to reports.
 
Sucaldito, one of the hosts of ABS-CBN's The Buzz, reportedly met with the accident Sunday night and was rushed to the hospital after complaining of extreme pain in his bottom.
 
X-rays subsequently revealed that a broken piece of cucumber, about five inches in length, had gotten lodged into the lower end of his large intestine.
 
It was not immediately clear how the cucumber got there.
 
The surgeons who operated on Sucaldito were tight-lipped and refused to discuss his case with media, citing doctor-patient confidentiality. Oddly enough, they all looked like they were trying vainly to keep from laughing and refused to look reporters in the eye.
 
Members of Sucaldito's household who declined to be named said they recovered the other half of the cucumber, also five inches in length, in Sucaldito's bedroom.
 
They said it had bite marks and was in a soggy state.
 
Besides the cucumber, they said they also found a bottle of Johnson's baby oil, pictures of scantily clad men, and lots of tissue paper.â€
 
Reached by phone, Sucaldito said he is fine and will be discharged from hospital soon. He explained that it was all an accident.
 
Gumagawa kasi ako ng salad. Napaupo ako dun sa chair e meron palang pipino dun na patayo ang pusisyon. Basta, mabilis kasi ang mga pangyayari (I was making a salad. I sat on a chair but there was a cucumber there in an upright position. Everything just happened so fast), he said.
 
In a related development, a group of vegan Filipinos is reportedly thinking of filing an abuse complaint against Sucaldito for allegedly molesting a harmless and defenseless vegetable.
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post-2148-0-72567300-1456800242_thumb.jp  Whatrever turns people on EH?

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sonjack2847
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Salad is healthy really this will make me think twice about eating it in the future How the hell did he manage to swallow a piece of cucumber 5 inches long is it deep throat or something.Tell him next time cut it into smaller pieces.

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Dave Hounddriver
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I did some Googling, as I am sure others have done, and it seems the earliest report of this seems to be early in 2009 and seems to have been a gag.

 

I suspect it is a gag based on the true story of a fellow admitted to a Cebu hospital about a year earlier with an Avon product lodged in his anus.  It caused quite a sensation when the doctors and nurses leaked the video of the operation to remove the product and that video got uploaded to Youtube.  I did not find the youtube link, but here is one of the news reports from that story

 

http://www.philstar.com:8080/nation/60685/rectal-surgery-scandal-admin-criminal-raps-poised-vs-cebu-hospital-personnel

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OnMyWay
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This is a true story.  My wife's cousin's godmother has a former classmate who works at the bank next door to that hospital.  She had lunch with one administrative assistant's from the front desk of the hospital, and she confirmed that her BFF had dated a guy who washes the cars of all the doctors, in the parking garage.  He said that one of the doctors, who happens to be a proctologist,  came out to get his car and was very upset.  He asked why and the doc said "I just had to take half a cucumber out of J.S.'s butt again, and tomorrow we have to hunt for the other half"!  The next day he was relieved to find out the other half was found at home.

 

Nope, can't make this stuff up!

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Jack Peterson
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The next day he was relieved to find out the other half was found at home.

:hystery:  USED?  :rolleyes: 

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Mike S
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So that is why I cannot find any vegetables here. I have been looking in the wrong places.

 

I just wanted to let you know that J is really pissed at you .... seems I took a drink of water while viewing your post and spewed water all over the coffee table .... that is the come-back of the year .... good job ....  :thumbsup:  :hystery:  :hystery:  :hystery:  :tiphat: 

:cheersty:

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