How Borrowing Money Affects Relationships

[Jake]

On 8/22/2016 at 0:19 AM, bows00 said:

And it is to the point where I see him differently now.  And don't get me wrong here, it is NOT about the money - I would have been better off just giving it to him as a gift. 

Ahh......such noble attributes.  But are you being realistic to yourself??  I mean 40 grand is 1.8 million pesos!  Please work on your communications skills and be more assertive.  Hell, I would start charging him interest compounded hourly.

Just saying.......

 

Post editing -- just realized wrong amount in my comment above.  Sorry guys -- this DOM is really getting old!

 

Edited August 24, 2016 by Jake
brain fart

[OnMyWay]

37 minutes ago, bows00 said:

How can someone forget?  Whenever I borrow, if I ever do, I pay it right back.  That task goes to the top of my priorities... 

I just said how someone can forget.

Don't assume that they stiffed you.  Give them a gentle reminder to see their reaction, before you condemn them.

[chris49]

15 hours ago, bows00 said:

How can someone forget?  Whenever I borrow, if I ever do, I pay it right back.  That task goes to the top of my priorities... 

I was buying lunch for a friend some years ago. A situation arose where the small restaurant did have change for 1000 SR, Saudi Riyals. So the friend kicked in a few bills and we made up the amount. It was my turn to buy, he bought the previous time. It was a few weeks later when he reminded me of the small amount I owed him. I completely blanked out on the transaction, and would not have remembered if he had not reminded me.

[Mr. Bobo]

11 hours ago, Reboot said:

14 hours ago, Mr. Bobo said:

him about it?

That in itself is a very bad sign. How can one forget he owes money to a friend?

If it was a 5000 dollar loan then I would agree with you but since it is only 40 bucks he may have forgotten. If I was the OP I would just make a casual comment to him like "Hey, what did you do? forget the 40 bucks I loaned you at the outing?" and then he will absolutely know what is going on based on his "friend's" response. 

[robert k]

Many years ago i had a step brother who would borrow tools. One day he wanted to borrow $100 and I loaned it to him. Did not see him again until my mothers funeral 20 years later. Considering the thousands of dollars in tools it saved me, best use of $100 ever!

[snowridr]

If getting the 40 $USD is that important to you, then consider asking a fellow coworker to ask on your behalf.  This way you don't embarrass him directly and spoil your work relationship which is probably worth much more than the $40.   

[AlwaysRt]

27 minutes ago, snowridr said:

If getting the 40 $USD is that important to you, then consider asking a fellow coworker to ask on your behalf.  This way you don't embarrass him directly and spoil your work relationship which is probably worth much more than the $40.   

or pick a day and before lunch time say "man, I'm getting hungry, how about taking me to lunch today", might get a "oh sh1t, I owe you lunch don't I?" or not but a very non confrontational way to bring it up.

[Dave Hounddriver]

On 8/22/2016 at 10:55 PM, bows00 said:

How can someone forget?

If there is any possibility that your memory is as bad as mine then he may have paid you back and its you that forgot.

But as a suggestion, how about finding an occasion to borrow $40 from him?  Then if he ever asks for it back just say you forgot and ask him if he ever paid back his $40.

[Steve GCC]

I have a very close friend who i get a specific type of cigars for when transiting airports that sell them.  Always takes him a month or so to pay up.  Simple if he doesnt i remind him and he does straight away.  Some peoples natures differ from our own perhaps sometimes.......

[Gratefuled]

Once, a co worker asked me for some money, $5 to be specific, to buy lunch. He forgot to bring a lunch. Instead, I offered him some of mine. I had plenty. He took it but would have rather I lend him the money. 

I wasn't going to loan (give) him $5 but I did not want him to go hungry.