Western Attraction Techniques on Filipinas...

[bows00]

During my course of work, I have to frequently travel to Guam for work, and I have a long time friend that travels with me.  While there, we enjoy having drinks at the bars where there are (American, Chinese, Taipei, Local) women to socialize with.

Now I have noticed that my friend has a unique ability to attract women - and it is not about his looks.  He has this confident, care free and fun attitude and has the ability to say things that can get under their skin.  He never pays them any compliments either.  He is everything but nice.  In fact there are times when he can be a bit obnoxious, to the point he pisses them off at times by saying things like "are you a lady-boy?".  But he is like a magnet, they keep returning for more and he has made many friends.  I just can't explain it. 

Now I also understand that Filipina's are a bit different.  Or are they?  I wonder if my friend would be just as successful with Filipinas...

[Jack Peterson]

1 hour ago, bows00 said:

I wonder if my friend would be just as successful with Filipinas...

I somehow doubt it, the humour is just not there, what we see as a joke and funny they will/may take offence to.

Filipinos in Guam and other places may have got used to weird sayings, not so here. In my Experience once you have lost a Filipino as a Friend or nearly a friend all is lost

The Ladies here just love compliments and making fun of all the selfies they take won't sit too well either, In the Western world, he may be a Hit But my friend, I would advise you not to bring him to the PI  and expect company.

JMHO but............

Jack 

 Morning All 

[robert k]

I think being clean cut and presentable at all times, polite and smile a lot. You won't go far wrong with that.

Walking the line between not being a cheap charlie and not being a fool with your money is the advance course and requires lots of field work. I know I'm not getting more than a just passing grade in this but I think I'm improving.

[Jake]

4 hours ago, bows00 said:

Now I have noticed that my friend has a unique ability to attract women - and it is not about his looks.  He has this confident, care free and fun attitude and has the ability to say things that can get under their skin.  He never pays them any compliments either.  He is everything but nice.  In fact there are times when he can be a bit obnoxious, to the point he pisses them off at times by saying things like "are you a lady-boy?".  But he is like a magnet, they keep returning for more and he has made many friends.  I just can't explain it. 

I wonder if my friend would be just as successful with Filipinas...

I believe generally speaking, most Filipinas are conservative, especially coming from the province.  I believe your long time friend will not be tolerated with his bastos behavior.  Sure, he can score multiple times in the seedy environment of Angeles City, just like any other sexpat or anyone else with a vulgar behavior.

He certainly would not be my friend.......

 

[chris49]

36 minutes ago, Jake said:

I believe generally speaking, most Filipinas are conservative, especially coming from the province.  I believe your long time friend will not be tolerated with his bastos behavior.  Sure, he can score multiple times in the seedy environment of Angeles City, just like any other sexpat or anyone else with a vulgar behavior.

He certainly would not be my friend.......

 

Right. What goes over in a bar doesn't work in daily life. Girls are in there to meet guys right?

My "friend" as I will call him loosely. Sometimes opens up a conversation by asking the girl if she is a virgin, which is absolutely cringeful.

But then if you play the subtle good guy role you will also get along fine.

[DavidK]

So long as he can open his wallet he should be a big hit...............

[OnMyWay]

5 hours ago, bows00 said:

Now I have noticed that my friend has a unique ability to attract women - and it is not about his looks.  He has this confident, care free and fun attitude and has the ability to say things that can get under their skin.  He never pays them any compliments either.  He is everything but nice.  In fact there are times when he can be a bit obnoxious, to the point he pisses them off at times by saying things like "are you a lady-boy?".  But he is like a magnet, they keep returning for more and he has made many friends.  I just can't explain it. 

 

53 minutes ago, chris49 said:

My "friend" as I will call him loosely. Sometimes opens up a conversation by asking the girl if she is a virgin, which is absolutely cringeful.

I know this guy!  And he would even use the virgin line with girls from the office when out for drinks after work, but at those times he would use it as a joke when discussing sex jokes or topics in front of them.

I went out for drinks with him many times because we were both single back then, and we both worked in the same department in San Francisco, Florida and Germany.  He was well versed in being a "bad boy" with all women, and they love it.  And one thing he did was flirt with all women, not just pretty ones, and they all loved being around him.  Also, a wedding ring was no obstacle to him.  He was decent looking, but one thing I noted that the women he ended up being with for actual relationships were not very good looking and strange.  The good looking ones seemed to just want to play the game and have fun while out for drinks.

So I was at his house in Germany one time, and one of our female co-workers pointed to a book he had on his bookshelf.  I can't recall the title, but she recognized it so it must be well known.  It was basically a book on how to be a "bad boy".  So I am not sure how much of his "talent" came naturally, or was learned!

BTW, he is in his 50's now and twice divorced.  The first one was his high school girlfriend who eventually dumped him due to his shenanigans, and the second one was a 19 year old Aussie that robbed him blind and was gone in 6 months!  He was about 38 at that time.

I agree with the others.  He would have very limited success with good girls in the Philippines, but would be the life of the party at bars and with bar girls.  Actually, he has been here and experienced the bar girls.  I never really considered him a friend.  More of an *sshole who was entertaining.  No room for guys like him in my life now.

[davewe]

16 hours ago, bows00 said:

During my course of work, I have to frequently travel to Guam for work, and I have a long time friend that travels with me.  While there, we enjoy having drinks at the bars where there are (American, Chinese, Taipei, Local) women to socialize with.

Now I have noticed that my friend has a unique ability to attract women - and it is not about his looks.  He has this confident, care free and fun attitude and has the ability to say things that can get under their skin.  He never pays them any compliments either.  He is everything but nice.  In fact there are times when he can be a bit obnoxious, to the point he pisses them off at times by saying things like "are you a lady-boy?".  But he is like a magnet, they keep returning for more and he has made many friends.  I just can't explain it. 

Now I also understand that Filipina's are a bit different.  Or are they?  I wonder if my friend would be just as successful with Filipinas...

What you are describing is what has become standard pickup/PUA (pick up artist) techniques in the West, which often rely on playful insults. This is sort of meant to compensate for the current innate advantage women have over men in Western dating cultures. Cut 'em down to size, so to speak.

I don't think that technique will work with Filipinas who will be offended and don't understand sarcasm. However, the overall confidence will work; he'd just have to tone down on the insults.

[bows00]

22 minutes ago, davewe said:

I don't think that technique will work with Filipinas who will be offended and don't understand sarcasm. However, the overall confidence will work; he'd just have to tone down on the insults.

Based on my limited experience with Filipina's, this was also my gut instinct on this.  There are cultural differences there where the western sarcasm's would be taken the wrong way. 

Good feedback guys. 

[Snowy79]

I think there's certainly some hidden thing that women see. I've said things to women that have had my friends cringing. Even the women after I've got to know them commented on it but laughed. I'm never offensive but I do push my luck at times. One of my friends even asked one women why she never slapped me and she said "he's funny and has a friendly face." It's the old saying " A good diplomat can tell you to fu@@ off in such a way you're looking forward to the journey."

That said women do love a bad lad. Whether it's cave man instinct that tells them he can look after them better or whether they see it as a challenge and they try to convince themselves that they'll be the one to change him I don't know. All I do know is I've seen plenty of nice guys lose out to guys I class as vermin. It's a bit of the x factor. Some people just have a way of carrying themselves that makes them stick out.