Anti Flatulence law signed by Duterte

[sonjack2847]

30 minutes ago, Jack Peterson said:

 Well at long last, my wife realizes the Guy is becoming a Wacko, only Michael Jackson was this weird

It`s time you all woke up and smelt the...

[Jollygoodfellow]

7 hours ago, scott h said:

You guys know what? I actually googles this just to make sure that it wasn't for real.

Sometimes I wonder where these sort of wacky stories come from 

[bows00]

I had to look up the meaning of "flatulence".  Sounds like a law they would invoke in Singapore - where it is civil and clean, like their gum chewing ban - but the Philippines?? 

[sonjack2847]

3 hours ago, Jollygoodfellow said:

Sometimes I wonder where these sort of wacky stories come from 

It came from you hahaha

 

[bows00]

The Philippines have to learn how to stop littering and pissing on the streets first!  Baby steps man...

[sonjack2847]

15 minutes ago, bows00 said:

The Philippines have to learn how to stop littering and pissing on the streets first!  Baby steps man...

When I was in Dalaguete they put 2 outside urinals, along the boulevard, for the men.I have seen many of them pissing right next to it but they wont go in.Some people around here burn their litter there is no need for it the same as there is no need to throw litter everywhere.But it will take a long time to change their attitude even if it can be changed.I think they need to learn to crawl before they take babysteps.

[CoffeeRulzMe]

I'm enjoying this thread. How long before this newbee gets access to a "Like" button?

I searched to answer my own question btw.  (or, maybe I'm not as smart as I tell myself)

Mods note: @Jollygoodfellow will have to answer that one

Edited May 25, 2017 by Dave Hounddriver

[not so old china hand]

In some societies passing wind in public is just not done. Amongst the Bedu in the Middle East, unlike belching after a meal, cutting the cheese is regarded as a major social faux pas. As the following story tells:

 

One night the men of the tribe were sitting in the chief's tent when Omar the Camel Driver could contain himself no longer and let forth a rip-snorter that would have made Jake proud. In great confusion he rushed from the tent, saddled his fastest camel and galloped away.

For many years he was a solitary traveller waiting for time and distance to erase the memory of his shame.

Finally, old and weary, he returned to his tribe where he was welcomed as a stranger and an honoured guest.

That evening he sat in the chief's tent sipping coffee while the elders told tales of long ago and far away.

 

"Tell me O Sheik." A youth asked at the end of one story. "When did this happen?"

 

"Ah..." replied the old man,

 

"It happened the year Omar the Camel Driver f@rted."

 

Edited May 25, 2017 by not so old china hand

[intrepid]

Try as I may and hard as I might,
I could not help myself,
I left one rip while out last night.
Oh my oh my I must confess,
It felt so good to get rid of the stress.
But now I’m worried cause it was not play,
So where do I go and how much to pay?

[Jake]

1 minute ago, intrepid said:

So where do I go and how much to pay?

OK Officer Danny, I'm gonna pick your brain and ask a very technical law enforcement question.  How does one collect evidence to effect an arrest on the spot?  Like a breath analyzer, does PNP have a anal anal-lyzer?  Is there a physical indicator where nearby witnesses can testify of their hardship, loss of work, loss of smell or inability to walk after the incident.  Does it become a capital punishment if one releases his "ambiance" in a closed environment, like in an elevator, movie theater or at the front pew while kneeling down at church services?  (I rather sit....the wooden bench is a great resonator).  

Inquisitive minds need to know this.  In the meantime, see ya around the campfire, blaze the saddles to see who could ignite the flame higher.....he, haw.  

Love your poetry, I can smell you a mile away.