Family allotment

[Old55]

My mother and father in law are in need of a live in helper with some basic geriatric nursing skill.

Before my wife and I became engaged we agreed we would not send money on a regular basis to our family living in Philippines 🇵🇭. Only if there’s an emergency. This agreement was acceptable to Mamma and Papa and all my sister in laws and was honored nearly 20 years now.

 This situation was not a surprise we saw it slowly coming. My wife and I have decided to provide an adequate amount to cover this new expense in fact are pleased to do so.

We will be very specific the allotment is to be used exclusively for the assistants pay. What I don’t want to happen is for extra expenses to creep in. How to best get everyone on the same page in a polite and respectful manner as we are in the States they are in Cebu?

Thanks 

Edited November 30, 2017 by Old55

[sonjack2847]

It seems that so far you have all been on the same page.If you are worried tell the helper you will pay her directly then you know where the money is going.What part of Cebu are they from sorry just being nosy as my wife is from there.

[Old55]

They lived down in Talisay near to the old city hall for years Kevin but moved to a subdivision well up above Talisay three or four years ago. 

[Dave Hounddriver]

"From each according to his ability, to each according to his needs" is a slogan popularized by Karl Marx.  So helping her parents (because they need and you have) is actually a communist philosophy unless she also helped your parents, in which case fair is fair.  But I am betting she would say:  Your parents have money so they have no need.  Hmmmm. Are you a commie?    

But seriously, there are no rules here.  If you want to help, do what makes you feel good.

[Jack Peterson]

5 hours ago, Old55 said:

We will be very specific the allotment is to be used exclusively for the assistants pay. What I don’t want to happen is for extra expenses to creep in.

 They might of course it seems the Way, What we  are going to do is start each of our helpers (we have 2) an ATM savings account and we  will pay the Salary into that. They have been with us long enough to trust and both have agreed so they don't have money laying around the House

 We can then also add a little for those Emergencies that may crop up. Yes it is easy for us here so not sure how you could arrange that from the US 

Just a thought here 

Edited December 1, 2017 by Jack Peterson
added a little

[Old55]

We plan to go through an agency for the caregiver. I trust my sisters to do the right thing but I like your idea Jack we could pay them from here I didn't think of that. Thanks

[Jack Peterson]

1 minute ago, Old55 said:

I didn't think of that.

This how we pay our Daughters Allowance each month and this gave me the Idea for the helpers I started this with the Daughter some years ago and now we pay the Tuition fees into it as well so all is well, It also gave her the incentive to save and control her money

[mogo51]

I think Jack's system has merit Old55 and give you peace of mind also.

Finding someone is the trick from what I can gather here, especially with qualifications.

[Old55]

Thanks Ron. My wife agrees.

Will share with you guys once we get things going.

[Capa]

On 12/1/2017 at 5:59 AM, Old55 said:

 

We will be very specific the allotment is to be used exclusively for the assistants pay. What I don’t want to happen is for extra expenses to creep in.

My wife's family is nothing but a bunch of parasites. Extra expenses always creep in. So I avoid them!