Jack of all trades, Master of none

[Snowy79]

I should know better but last week I decided I was going to build an outdoor dog kennel for my two dogs.  I casually mentioned itn to my partner who in turn mentioned it to our caretakers wife.  It turns out her husband has made them before and knows all about them so my partner suggested I use him just so he can earn a little extra money.

Within 5 minutes of agreeing he was at my door with his hand out for money for the materials.  He shot off and returned within 15 mins with marine ply and nails.  I queried the nails as I was expecting screws for a more secure fitment but was assured it's OK.  He got stuck in straight away and I was expecting about a 3hr job.  The following day he's still hard at work and I commented to my partner that surely he should be finishing by now.  Two hours later she tells me he's off to buy a wood chisel to cut holes for ventilation.  I told her I'd usually use a drill for holes but why is he even cutting holes?  I'd gave him a drawing of the kennel design with a slopping roof that overhung the sides by a good six inches.  I'd even made a card board cut out of the sides with triangular vents cut at intervals along the top so the air could circulate but due to the ovehang rain couldn't get in.  These he could cut just using the saw.  I stopped him in time and got him to cut the triangles.  I'd even explained that the entrance needed a small tunnel leading to the main entrance so rain couldn't get in.  

Two and a half days later he calls me to see the finished article.  I briefed my partner that if I said " her daughter will love this" it meant it was bad.  Well when I saw it her daughter would have f@@ki'" loved it.  He'd sub contracted the cutting to Stevie Wonder I think.  The roof joint on top had gaps all along it, it overhung the sides by about 2 inches and each triangular vent was different sizes.  The back of the kennel was made out of 5 different cuts of wood with gaps between each one as he'd obviously measured wrong and tried to make it fit, at the top of the back he'd cut a diamond shaped vent hole that a small dog could jump through along with every downpour.  The entrance I could almost walk into and there was no tunnel to shelter from the rain.  All in including parts which I got receipts for and his 1,200 peso wage it came in at just under 6k peso.  To make it worse he'd used 12mm ply for the sides and 6mm for the roof.  It's more fun in the Philippines. 

[sonjack2847]

3 hours ago, Snowy79 said:

I should know better but last week I decided I was going to build an outdoor dog kennel for my two dogs.  I casually mentioned itn to my partner who in turn mentioned it to our caretakers wife.  It turns out her husband has made them before and knows all about them so my partner suggested I use him just so he can earn a little extra money.

Within 5 minutes of agreeing he was at my door with his hand out for money for the materials.  He shot off and returned within 15 mins with marine ply and nails.  I queried the nails as I was expecting screws for a more secure fitment but was assured it's OK.  He got stuck in straight away and I was expecting about a 3hr job.  The following day he's still hard at work and I commented to my partner that surely he should be finishing by now.  Two hours later she tells me he's off to buy a wood chisel to cut holes for ventilation.  I told her I'd usually use a drill for holes but why is he even cutting holes?  I'd gave him a drawing of the kennel design with a slopping roof that overhung the sides by a good six inches.  I'd even made a card board cut out of the sides with triangular vents cut at intervals along the top so the air could circulate but due to the ovehang rain couldn't get in.  These he could cut just using the saw.  I stopped him in time and got him to cut the triangles.  I'd even explained that the entrance needed a small tunnel leading to the main entrance so rain couldn't get in.  

Two and a half days later he calls me to see the finished article.  I briefed my partner that if I said " her daughter will love this" it meant it was bad.  Well when I saw it her daughter would have f@@ki'" loved it.  He'd sub contracted the cutting to Stevie Wonder I think.  The roof joint on top had gaps all along it, it overhung the sides by about 2 inches and each triangular vent was different sizes.  The back of the kennel was made out of 5 different cuts of wood with gaps between each one as he'd obviously measured wrong and tried to make it fit, at the top of the back he'd cut a diamond shaped vent hole that a small dog could jump through along with every downpour.  The entrance I could almost walk into and there was no tunnel to shelter from the rain.  All in including parts which I got receipts for and his 1,200 peso wage it came in at just under 6k peso.  To make it worse he'd used 12mm ply for the sides and 6mm for the roof.  It's more fun in the Philippines. 

Do you have his number he sounds like one of the better tradesmen here.I`m afraid Snowy whilst we live here gone are the days we can kick idiots off of our jobs.So far I have been lucky and at least they listen to me.

[JDDavao II]

I feel your pain, Snowy79. Back when we were building our wall, we hired a fellow to finish our gate columns (I think "parge" is the word). They'd been left unfinished and pocked with divots to hold the finishing coat since the gates were the last thing to go on and we booted the crew off of the premises immediately thereafter.

He was working on a refurbishment job in the house across from our rented abode. My wife went over and asked him, "I have a small job I need done, are you a mason?"

"Yeah, I'm a mason."

Well, all of our columns are square and sharp-cornered. When he was done, he had round, uneven faces on the four he finished. It's like he hadn't listened and hadn't bothered to look at the other columns.

Our little code phrase for someone who's full of crap is now, "Yeah, I'm a mason." 

[Mick]

It's not limited to chippies. My Sinks in the kitchen had a small leak, just a job I had not got too, I was about to leave to the airport, and low and behold, the leak got worse, so I showed my little darling, and the maid what was needed, get a plumber 2 new traps, t-joint, new pipe through the wall in to the drain..... Easy, the maid found a plumber working on a new build up the road, 3000 peso all in including materials, I'm in NAIA when the message came through. OK go ahead less for me to do and I'm not back for 2 days .... Mmmmmmmm should have known better, they put new traps, no rubber seals, (resale value apparently) Instead caked all Compression joints in epoxy resin, but outside and under the sink a nice new shiny pipe through the wall to the drain...... Mmmmmm untill today, when the maid knocked it and it flooded the kitchen, they had cut the old pipe flush to the wall inside and out, gobbed the old pipe with resin in the wall, and just rammed a larger pipe over it, inside and outside so it all looked new,  b@s[a*rds...so my afternoon has just been spent replacing everything again for only 800 Peso..... And of course the plumbers are no longer on the site, god knows what the new owner there will find in the new build

Edited September 10, 2018 by Mick

[JDDavao II]

8 minutes ago, Mick said:

It's not limited to chippies. My Sinks in the kitchen had a small leak, just a job I had not got too, I was about to leave to the airport, and low and behold, the leak got worse, so I showed my little darling, and the maid what was needed, get a plumber 2 new traps, t-joint, new pipe through the wall in to the drain..... Easy, the maid found a plumber working on a new build up the road, 3000 peso all in including materials, I'm in NAIA when the message came through. OK go ahead less for me to do and I'm not back for 2 days .... Mmmmmmmm should have known better, they put new traps, no rubber seals, (resale value apparently) Instead caked all Compression joints in epoxy resin, but outside and under the sink a nice new shiny pipe through the wall to the drain...... Mmmmmm untill today, when the maid knocked it and it flooded the kitchen, they had cut the old pipe flush to the wall inside and out, gobbed the old pipe with resin in the wall, and just rammed a larger pipe over it, inside and outside so it all looked new,  b@s[a*rds...so my afternoon has just been spent replacing everything again for only 800 Peso..... And of course the plumbers are no longer on the site, god knows what the new owner there will find in the new build

I can't even start with plumbers. My doctor has ordered me off the topic. *sigh*

[Dave Hounddriver]

13 minutes ago, JDDavao said:

I can't even start with plumbers

Do they have plumbers here?  (Other than retired expat plumbers I mean.) I thought they only had handymen with rubber inner tubes and cement to fix plumbing.  That's all I've ever found.

[Mick]

41 minutes ago, JDDavao said:

I can't even start with plumbers. My doctor has ordered me off the topic. *sigh*

I think I need to visit your doctor 

[bastonjock]

The gf is heading up to the farm lot this week  ,she says its to make sure that the workers do a good job ,we have had a small bang house built and finished and the electricity and water get connected this week , papa who is a master carpenter (allegedly) has been employed as an overseer to keep an eye on the guys and materials ,heres hoping lol 

[Mike J]

11 hours ago, Dave Hounddriver said:

Do they have plumbers here?  (Other than retired expat plumbers I mean.) I thought they only had handymen with rubber inner tubes and cement to fix plumbing.  That's all I've ever found.

We paid a "plumber" when the house for Papa and Mama was built.  When the CR vanity drain started to leak at the house a couple of years later, I went over to fix it.  The 1 1/4 inch lav drain goes into a 2 inch pipe that was cut flush to the wall.  That is where it was leaking.  When I pulled the drain lav pipe I found they were using plastic bags and vulca seal as a reducer.  Respect for Papa and Mama was the only thing that kept my language in check when describing what the plumber had done. 

[sonjack2847]

It is an insult to real plumbers to call the people here Plumbers.