Dog swallows manhood whole

[JDDavao II]

Someone should tell the authorities to be on the lookout for a gorilla.

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A fellow wakes up one morning to a terrible noise on his roof. He goes outside to find it's a gorilla!

So he Googles and sure enough, there's an ad for "Gorilla Removers". He calls the number, and the gorilla remover says he"ll be there in 30 minutes.

The gorilla remover arrives and gets out of his van. He's got a ladder, a baseball bat, a shotgun and a huge, ferocious-looking dog.

"What are you going to do?", the homeowner asks.

"I'm going to put up this ladder against the roof, then I'm going to go up there and knock the gorilla off the roof with the bat. When the gorilla falls off, the dog is trained to grab the gorilla's testicles and squeeze. The gorilla will be subdued enough for me to lock him in the cage in the back of the van.", says the gorilla remover and hands him the shotgun.

"What's the shotgun for?", asks the homeowner.

"If the gorilla knocks ME off the roof, shoot the dog."

[Gary D]

So they can't wait until the next day and sow what remains back on. I guess the more the dog chews the more it gets.

[Jollygoodfellow]

44 minutes ago, Gary D said:

So they can't wait until the next day and sow what remains back on. I guess the more the dog chews the more it gets.

The story said swallowed whole so unless they operate I guess no point waiting till it comes out but anyway probably contaminated once inside the dog.  There would probably be only so much time before the nerve endings are damaged. I remembered once I posted either video or story of a Filipino peeing through the hole in the fence. Not a good choice with the dog on the other side. 

[BKB]

17 hours ago, Dave Hounddriver said:

Perhaps the man is not married and the bulldog is his only companion.  Coming home from the party it could be that the bulldog smelled other dogs on him and went all Lorena Bobbit on the poor boy.

I don't expect we will ever know the truth of the matter. I was kinda shocked at the US dog bite stats, makes me glad I chose Poodles over an English Bulldog.

Dog Bite Statistics

• Approximately 4.7 million dog bites¹ occur each year
• Dogs that bite the most:²
  • Chihuahua
  • Bulldog
  • Pit Bull
  • German Shepherd
  • Australian Shepherd
  • Lhasa Apso
  • Jack Russell Terrier
  • Cocker Spaniel
  • Bull Terrier
  • Pekingese
  • Papillion
• In 2017, there were an estimated 90 million dogs in the U.S

[BKB]

[Snowy79]

20 hours ago, Old55 said:

 

Bulldogs are very mild mannered timid even. Are you thinking of Pitbulls?

My money is on it being a Sausage dog.