Travis Posted March 15, 2010 Posted March 15, 2010 (edited) how did you meet your wife? & why do you think you have a happy marriage? Edited March 15, 2010 by Traveler Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
parksb2 Posted March 15, 2010 Posted March 15, 2010 how did you meet your wife? & why do you think you have a happy marriage?Deep questions. Here's my FWIW - for what it's worth1 . "Blind date"; I had been fixed up a few times. I went on the net FH is the site posted and ad; very frank ad. My wife was the only one of dozens of responses who wasn't a "seeking soulmate/life partner; shaft full of money; ulterior motives; you're the most gwpao, buotan, charming man ever" response. We agreed after brief banter 3 to 4 emails to meet face to face to see if we at least got along. It was lets meet at Ayala (nice and public so we can bail if either of us get uncomfortable), near the Bo's and just chat, if we can carry conversation then dinner maybe. We've gotten along ever since. Bear in mind neither of us had violins in mind and/or visions of cupid over our shoulders going in. We both simply knew we weren't about to meet someone for a run of the mill date. We both left with the desire to see the other person, I left knowing I really wanted to see her again that was it. 2. A happy marriage is knowing you're not perfect nor is she. Setting expectations upfront as much as you can. When each of you wants the other to be happy and yourself to be happy thats when it works; at least for us.Best of luck, and know yourself first. What you want, why you want it. Also relax about it, just say this to yourself and know it's true " it will happen if it's right". Trying to hard is a guaranteed way to run down the wrong paths. I met my wife having essentially given up on finding a partner, I just went out to have some fun, good conversation with someone pretty that was it..Decent ladies don't care about your looks, house, car, job, scars from being reckless, size of stamp collection you name it.. they're interested in you because you're you.. If all you are is the prior then expect no more interest than that.. But you need to be presentable, and have something on the ball.Decent men don't care about your looks, house, car, job, scars from being reckless, size of stamp collection you name it.. they're interested in you because you're you.. If all you are is the prior then expect no more interest than that.. But you need to be presentable, and have something on the ball. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Posted March 15, 2010 Posted March 15, 2010 (edited) how did you meet your wife? & why do you think you have a happy marriage? Good post starter Traveler. Fortunately, it's a two part question with the first one easy to answer but the second one could be subjective, depending on the current mood of the poster and the current state of affairs within the marriage. I met Judy back in the early 1980's when I was still active US Navy. Back then Hugh Hefner had enough investment to support his numerous International Playboy Clubs, one of which was located on the 3rd floor of Salahis Hotel, along Roxas Blvd in Manila. Knowing full well that asking for a date from a Playboy Bunny was strictly forbidden, I somehow gained enough courage (beers) to ask anyway. After months of overseas courtship (international calls, flowers, letters), I persuaded the family matriarch (her grandmother) for her blessings. We were finally married in San Diego in 1985.This coming June will be our 25th anniversary. I must say it was an emotional roller coaster with a couple of derailments along the way. Either she would fly back to PI for a few months or I find some solitude in my dog house. We have four beautiful children with the eldest at 23 and youngest at 15. I just recently became a Lolo (grandfather) of my first grandson, so overall I think I have been blessed, despite my immature stubbornness at times. To be honest, I believe it was me that needed an overhaul on how to succeed in marriage. I thought that the American way of life and my background of military discipline was the only way. Wrong in every account. My wife Judy is an Angel of patience and love. Any other woman would have dumped me a long time ago. Respectfully -- Jake Edited May 31, 2012 by Jake enlarge font Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Travis Posted March 18, 2010 Author Posted March 18, 2010 thank you for the reply & I would appreciate it if more happy married men would reply too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheMason Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 I met my wife online and then met her in person about 3 months later. We have a happy marriage because we are both patient people willing to listen to and accommodate opposing points of view. We also agree on some of the basic concepts of what it means to be a good person and how good people should live their lives. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Singers Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 (edited) thank you for the reply & I would appreciate it if more happy married men would reply too I met my wife online and then met her in person about 3 months later. We have a happy marriage because we are both patient people willing to listen to and accommodate opposing points of view. We also agree on some of the basic concepts of what it means to be a good person and how good people should live their lives. THE MASONHappily Married Men?? Am I ONE?.Yes I am happy and content and would have no hesitation in re-Living the relationship Cristina & I have.We met in S'pore at Church and again by accident days later. My 2nd visit to church in 5 years. I am not a God bother'er.Tex is patient and a good person and willing to listen and does shares my values. Point of view (mostly). Well sometimes?. Occasionally?? Hardly ever... Her mission, she says, is to "humanize" me by showing me more Love in life. She smiles and sings and jokes with me all the time and tells me I make her happy???. I am truly blessed.I have NO patience, I don't listen often, or accommodate others opinions readily and am a deplorable person to have to live with at home.In public I wear a "cloak" of reasonableness. All a sham though.We get on exceedingly well. I expect she will be Canonized some time soon. Tex says "life with you is never boring".When Cristina started working, in UK in a Nursing Home next door, I had flowers delivered on her 1st. day. The card read "God sent You to me....The Devil sent me to you". Nothing has changed in 4 years. Gave the other nursing staff a good laugh. The Dali Lama said "Embrace New Love with openness and commit fully". It was more like "enter with abandon" I now remember. Same - same ??.Not a bad attitude to have when starting a new relationship. You may stumble BUT always try again. UK Tom Edited March 18, 2010 by Singers Repair quotes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 thank you for the reply & I would appreciate it if more happy married men would reply too I met my wife online and then met her in person about 3 months later. We have a happy marriage because we are both patient people willing to listen to and accommodate opposing points of view. We also agree on some of the basic concepts of what it means to be a good person and how good people should live their lives. THE MASONHappily Married Men?? Am I ONE?.Yes I am happy and content and would have no hesitation in re-Living the relationship Cristina & I have.We met in S'pore at Church and again by accident days later. My 2nd visit to church in 5 years. I am not a God bother'er.Tex is patient and a good person and willing to listen and does shares my values. Point of view (mostly). Well sometimes?. Occasionally?? Hardly ever... Her mission, she says, is to "humanize" me by showing me more Love in life. She smiles and sings and jokes with me all the time and tells me I make her happy???. I am truly blessed.I have NO patience, I don't listen often, or accommodate others opinions readily and am a deplorable person to have to live with at home.In public I wear a "cloak" of reasonableness. All a sham though.We get on exceedingly well. I expect she will be Canonized some time soon. Tex says "life with you is never boring".When Cristina started working, in UK in a Nursing Home next door, I had flowers delivered on her 1st. day. The card read "God sent You to me....The Devil sent me to you". Nothing has changed in 4 years. Gave the other nursing staff a good laugh. The Dali Lama said "Embrace New Love with openness and commit fully". It was more like "enter with abandon" I now remember. Same - same ??.Not a bad attitude to have when starting a new relationship. You may stumble BUT always try again. UK Tom Hello Tom,Could I dare say that Cristina is the happily married woman? I believe our wifes did "embrace new love with opennessand commit fully". I also believe that they had to set a higher level of tolerance when they met us. Somehow, theytaught some old dogs like us some new tricks -- you know, some new obedient skills. And with that in mind, we areforever grateful, especially when keeping us younger with virility. Oooh yeah.....!Respectfully -- Jake Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Singers Posted March 18, 2010 Posted March 18, 2010 thank you for the reply & I would appreciate it if more happy married men would reply too I met my wife online and then met her in person about 3 months later. We have a happy marriage because we are both patient people willing to listen to and accommodate opposing points of view. We also agree on some of the basic concepts of what it means to be a good person and how good people should live their lives. THE MASONHappily Married Men?? Am I ONE?.Yes I am happy and content and would have no hesitation in re-Living the relationship Cristina & I have.We met in S'pore at Church and again by accident days later. My 2nd visit to church in 5 years. I am not a God bother'er.Tex is patient and a good person and willing to listen and does shares my values. Point of view (mostly). Well sometimes?. Occasionally?? Hardly ever... Her mission, she says, is to "humanize" me by showing me more Love in life. She smiles and sings and jokes with me all the time and tells me I make her happy???. I am truly blessed.I have NO patience, I don't listen often, or accommodate others opinions readily and am a deplorable person to have to live with at home.In public I wear a "cloak" of reasonableness. All a sham though.We get on exceedingly well. I expect she will be Canonized some time soon. Tex says "life with you is never boring".When Cristina started working, in UK in a Nursing Home next door, I had flowers delivered on her 1st. day. The card read "God sent You to me....The Devil sent me to you". Nothing has changed in 4 years. Gave the other nursing staff a good laugh. The Dali Lama said "Embrace New Love with openness and commit fully". It was more like "enter with abandon" I now remember. Same - same ??.Not a bad attitude to have when starting a new relationship. You may stumble BUT always try again. UK Tom Hello Tom,Could I dare say that Cristina is the happily married woman? I believe our wifes did "embrace new love with opennessand commit fully". I also believe that they had to set a higher level of tolerance when they met us. Somehow, theytaught some old dogs like us some new tricks -- you know, some new obedient skills. And with that in mind, we areforever grateful, especially when keeping us younger with virility. Oooh yeah.....!Respectfully -- Jake Hello Jake,You got it in 1. Just asked Cristina if she should be included in "The happily Married Women"? "Yes please" she said - nodding her head.!!I am fortunate in having experienced Eastern Culture for 30 years and latterly 6 years living S/E Asia. My "Tom Cat" ways were well known to Tex in Singapore but as our relationship was purely platonic for the first 18 months and I considered her way too young for me I was not hiding anything. I did not see her love then as she was only 21. Somehow Tex saw some good in me and persisted. Now we are SoulMates. SOo Lucky Tom.It seems you, Jake, and I are very fortunate indeed.With Kind regards,Tom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldutot Posted March 19, 2010 Posted March 19, 2010 (edited) Hi traveler, In July, we will be celebrating the 28th. I was introduced to my wife from a friend. Being happy in my marriage, she has given me everything in life, that I dreamed of. I feel that I'm bless, oldutot Edited March 19, 2010 by oldutot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Travis Posted March 20, 2010 Author Posted March 20, 2010 Hi traveler, In July, we will be celebrating the 28th. I was introduced to my wife from a friend. Being happy in my marriage, she has given me everything in life, that I dreamed of. I feel that I'm bless, oldutot I hope that I will one day meet a great lady too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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