Mr Lee Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 No I did not say imbibing :SugarwareZ-037: we all know that can be a way of life in the Philippines. :89: To me a lie is a lie and that is because I grew up in the US where a mans word was his bond. Now I am not saying all Americans are like that, that would be very far from the truth, but those of us who live by our word find it hard to trust anyone who does not. I just read Che Che's post HERE and it seems to imply that Filipinos may feel that fibs are not lies, so I wonder how many people actually feel that way? Do other cultures accept fibs? Now do not get me wrong, I am not saying I have never told a fib or bent the truth when talking to people, but I do not feel that a fib or lie is acceptable in a relationship and I am wondering if either I am wrong or if Filipinos think it is acceptable? Herein may lie a major problem in relationships between the two. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
URGIRL Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 (edited) :36_6_3[1]: lol lee i said,( Another way is to rename lying as fibbing or a little white lie) in relationship of course being honest is most important,(honesty being the best policy generally still holds) every person have fibs.....some funny lie,serious lie or need to lie so that the person u love not to worry so much especially to those who have long distance relationship some lie are good some lie are bad.but what am into in fibbing is just light lie..not major major thing :) :P anyway tc be safe out there....kind regards,che che No I did not say imbibing :lol: we all know that can be a way of life in the Philippines. :yes: To me a lie is a lie and that is because I grew up in the US where a mans word was his bond. Now I am not saying all Americans are like that, that would be very far from the truth, but those of us who live by our word find it hard to trust anyone who does not. I just read Che Che's post HERE and it seems to imply that Filipinos may feel that fibs are not lies, so I wonder how many people actually feel that way? Do other cultures accept fibs? Now do not get me wrong, I am not saying I have never told a fib or bent the truth when talking to people, but I do not feel that a fib or lie is acceptable in a relationship and I am wondering if either I am wrong or if Filipinos think it is acceptable? Herein may lie a major problem in relationships between the two. Edited December 9, 2010 by URGIRL Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Hounddriver Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Here is a list to get you started. I'm somewhat of a mind reader and when I see my foreign friends talking with some filipinas I can almost read the poor girl's mind. Here's my perception of it:1) No, I have no boyfriend or husband (truth = that I want to admit to at this time)2) I have no children (truth = living with me 'cause my mother looks after them)3) You are so gwapo (truth = that is just a polite thing to say)4) I don't want your money (truth = not today because I am grooming you for a long term haul)5) I am just going to visit my auntie (truth = before going out with my friend)6) I love you so much (truth = as much as I have loved everyone else I have been with)7) I will live anywhere with you (truth = as long as it is a house and lot in my name paid for by you)8) I did not touch it (truth = I say that because if you knew I took it you will be mad)9) I need some new clothes (truth = I don't really but I want to give my old ones to my cousins so I need you to buy me some new stuff)10) Age doesn't matter (truth = It really doesn't. As long as I get what I need from the relationship then I could care less how old you are. In fact young guys are too easy and somewhat boring so bring on the old guys who are a challenge to me.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
URGIRL Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 ops!! its hurt :36_6_3[1]: lol i just remember one of my friend told me first come out to ur mouth is truth even u say just kidding cz u don't let that person be offended :lol:, anyway i cant blame u on how u read this stuff truth is kinda hurt but we as a filipino were just to kind to tell the person he/she is ugly cz we just felt sorry to the person and we don't want him/her feel low self esteem were not that totaly rude like the other countries ..... even he/she doesn't have good appearance but in the eyes of God were equal so its good to remember that way.... :yes: tc be safe :)kind regards,che che Here is a list to get you started. I'm somewhat of a mind reader and when I see my foreign friends talking with some filipinas I can almost read the poor girl's mind. Here's my perception of it:1) No, I have no boyfriend or husband (truth = that I want to admit to at this time)2) I have no children (truth = living with me 'cause my mother looks after them)3) You are so gwapo (truth = that is just a polite thing to say)4) I don't want your money (truth = not today because I am grooming you for a long term haul)5) I am just going to visit my auntie (truth = before going out with my friend)6) I love you so much (truth = as much as I have loved everyone else I have been with)7) I will live anywhere with you (truth = as long as it is a house and lot in my name paid for by you)8) I did not touch it (truth = I say that because if you knew I took it you will be mad)9) I need some new clothes (truth = I don't really but I want to give my old ones to my cousins so I need you to buy me some new stuff)10) Age doesn't matter (truth = It really doesn't. As long as I get what I need from the relationship then I could care less how old you are. In fact young guys are too easy and somewhat boring so bring on the old guys who are a challenge to me.) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeB Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Here is a list to get you started. I'm somewhat of a mind reader and when I see my foreign friends talking with some filipinas I can almost read the poor girl's mind. Here's my perception of it:1) No, I have no boyfriend or husband (truth = that I want to admit to at this time)2) I have no children (truth = living with me 'cause my mother looks after them)3) You are so gwapo (truth = that is just a polite thing to say)4) I don't want your money (truth = not today because I am grooming you for a long term haul)5) I am just going to visit my auntie (truth = before going out with my friend)6) I love you so much (truth = as much as I have loved everyone else I have been with)7) I will live anywhere with you (truth = as long as it is a house and lot in my name paid for by you)8) I did not touch it (truth = I say that because if you knew I took it you will be mad)9) I need some new clothes (truth = I don't really but I want to give my old ones to my cousins so I need you to buy me some new stuff)10) Age doesn't matter (truth = It really doesn't. As long as I get what I need from the relationship then I could care less how old you are. In fact young guys are too easy and somewhat boring so bring on the old guys who are a challenge to me.) lol. Except in my case # 3 is true . I think it's a different standard, many times my Filipine friends will tell me things I want to hear that are not the truth. I agree with Lee, a lie is a lie and the most valuable thing you have is your word. The basis of any good relationship is trust. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjp52 Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 We all do it in some form. What really matters is the consequences of the lie. My wife had a aunt that was not very pretty and I use to tell her how beautiful she was and she would love to hear it as she said no one had ever told her that before. If you tell a lie to cheat someone or hurt them in some way than it is wrong. I have noticed it a bit more in the Philippines than back home and yes I think it is a normal way of life here for some. Just like always being an hour late for an party or get together. Filipinos tend to over look faults and wrong doings and by doing so they promote more of it. But their good qualities are far greater than their bad. A lot of the things that foreigners say bad about Filipinos ( if they are true ) you can probably blame most of it on their lack of education and poverty. We are so lucky to grow up in a country where we are guarantied a good education and always have food in our bellies. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
adventureguy Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 To me a lie is a lie and that is because I grew up in the US where a mans word was his bond. Now I am not saying all Americans are like that, that would be very far from the truth, but those of us who live by our word find it hard to trust anyone who does not. :lol: I am from the same school Mr. Lee. :yes: A mans word is his honor. :36_6_3[1]: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gary Posted December 9, 2010 Posted December 9, 2010 Here is a list to get you started. I'm somewhat of a mind reader and when I see my foreign friends talking with some filipinas I can almost read the poor girl's mind. Here's my perception of it:1) No, I have no boyfriend or husband (truth = that I want to admit to at this time)2) I have no children (truth = living with me 'cause my mother looks after them)3) You are so gwapo (truth = that is just a polite thing to say)4) I don't want your money (truth = not today because I am grooming you for a long term haul)5) I am just going to visit my auntie (truth = before going out with my friend)6) I love you so much (truth = as much as I have loved everyone else I have been with)7) I will live anywhere with you (truth = as long as it is a house and lot in my name paid for by you)8) I did not touch it (truth = I say that because if you knew I took it you will be mad)9) I need some new clothes (truth = I don't really but I want to give my old ones to my cousins so I need you to buy me some new stuff)10) Age doesn't matter (truth = It really doesn't. As long as I get what I need from the relationship then I could care less how old you are. In fact young guys are too easy and somewhat boring so bring on the old guys who are a challenge to me.)All the way from Number 1 to Number 10, sounds soooooo familar, Been there quit a few times and heard it all before :36_6_3[1]: The bad thing is if you live in the USA you have no way of knowing if you get lied to or not. But if its sounds to good to be true, it most likely is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forum Support Old55 Posted December 10, 2010 Forum Support Posted December 10, 2010 From what I have seen most Asians will lie in order to save face or to avoid any thing that could cause loss of face to them or another. This is normal and fully understood by other Asians. If you are close to an Asian you will come to know the subtle rules of those lies and when to play along. Many times there may not be a direct lie but a deflection or incomplete answer. I’m not talking about thieves and scammers but normal Asians. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oldutot Posted December 11, 2010 Posted December 11, 2010 (edited) From what I have seen most Asians will lie in order to save face or to avoid any thing that could cause loss of face to them or another. This is normal and fully understood by other Asians. If you are close to an Asian you will come to know the subtle rules of those lies and when to play along. Many times there may not be a direct lie but a deflection or incomplete answer. I’m not talking about thieves and scammers but normal Asians. Old55 Edited December 11, 2010 by oldutot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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