ekimswish Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 I had to come and do some investigating on Google (of all places) because of an incident on Facebook (of all other places). My wife posted a picture on Facebook for me, where she's posing as pretty as can be. All her friends commented about how beautiful she is. Then this Sri Lankan guy whom she only added because of Farmville or Tikitown, etc., said: "Hey sexy. How's it goin'?"This irked me because she's my wife and he's a stranger to us out there in cyberspace. I wrote him a message where I politely told him she's my wife, and I would appreciate him not saying things like that to her. I thanked him for his understanding. He wrote back calling me "narrow-minded" in this new world, so I wrote back telling him I could show him how open-minded I am if he introduced me to his mother, lol, on Facebook (of all places).He wrote me a foul-language laced rant talking about how he was going to F my wife in various places, and he's super rich, owns a 4-star hotel in the Philippines, and only goes there to F all the PInay hoes, and blah blah blah. He said he owns various nice cars, and has a house in LA, and gets respect for beating white B's like me. Anyways, I wrote back sarcastically giving him all kinds of praise, because he's probably just BS'ing. Still, I couldn't sleep and had to come check him out online. Last thing I want is for some actually rich guy to attack my family. I think it's all good now, but still.... had me bothered. What to do? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr Lee Posted June 21, 2011 Posted June 21, 2011 I had to come and do some investigating on Google (of all places) because of an incident on Facebook (of all other places). My wife posted a picture on Facebook for me, where she's posing as pretty as can be. All her friends commented about how beautiful she is. Then this Sri Lankan guy whom she only added because of Farmville or Tikitown, etc., said: "Hey sexy. How's it goin'?"This irked me because she's my wife and he's a stranger to us out there in cyberspace. I wrote him a message where I politely told him she's my wife, and I would appreciate him not saying things like that to her. I thanked him for his understanding. He wrote back calling me "narrow-minded" in this new world, so I wrote back telling him I could show him how open-minded I am if he introduced me to his mother, lol, on Facebook (of all places).He wrote me a foul-language laced rant talking about how he was going to F my wife in various places, and he's super rich, owns a 4-star hotel in the Philippines, and only goes there to F all the PInay hoes, and blah blah blah. He said he owns various nice cars, and has a house in LA, and gets respect for beating white B's like me. Anyways, I wrote back sarcastically giving him all kinds of praise, because he's probably just BS'ing. Still, I couldn't sleep and had to come check him out online. Last thing I want is for some actually rich guy to attack my family. I think it's all good now, but still.... had me bothered. What to do? Not much I think you can do except possibly report him to Facebook since I am guessing that they do not wish their site to be used for that, and that is yet another reason I do not belong to sites such as that. Tell your wife to remove the photo and email you future photos, also I think she can block the guy because there is way too much info out there on sites like that, and predators mining them for information. Also lots of pictures taken with smart phones put in gps locations, making it easier to find people. I have often been amazed at some things I have read where people basically say where they live, when they go to work, who is home and when no one will be home etc, so IMHO everyone needs to be careful of what they put on public sites. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Forum Support Old55 Posted June 21, 2011 Forum Support Posted June 21, 2011 I had to come and do some investigating on Google (of all places) because of an incident on Facebook (of all other places). My wife posted a picture on Facebook for me, where she's posing as pretty as can be. All her friends commented about how beautiful she is. Then this Sri Lankan guy whom she only added because of Farmville or Tikitown, etc., said: "Hey sexy. How's it goin'?"This irked me because she's my wife and he's a stranger to us out there in cyberspace. I wrote him a message where I politely told him she's my wife, and I would appreciate him not saying things like that to her. I thanked him for his understanding. He wrote back calling me "narrow-minded" in this new world, so I wrote back telling him I could show him how open-minded I am if he introduced me to his mother, lol, on Facebook (of all places).He wrote me a foul-language laced rant talking about how he was going to F my wife in various places, and he's super rich, owns a 4-star hotel in the Philippines, and only goes there to F all the PInay hoes, and blah blah blah. He said he owns various nice cars, and has a house in LA, and gets respect for beating white B's like me. Anyways, I wrote back sarcastically giving him all kinds of praise, because he's probably just BS'ing. Still, I couldn't sleep and had to come check him out online. Last thing I want is for some actually rich guy to attack my family. I think it's all good now, but still.... had me bothered. What to do?Have your wife change the settings of her facebook to block him and report him. I'm sure your family is safe but perhaps you should review any personal information your wife lists. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Hounddriver Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Judging from my previous experience with 2 marriages and more relationships than I should have had, I have an uneasy feeling that your marriage is headed into rough water. Not just from this post but from other things you have written also.I feel that facebook and similar 'social networking' sites are a minefield for lonely women (and probably lonely men). I am only suggesting that you start seriously investigating options that will allow you to spend more quality time with your wife before you have no options.I am a bit of a dinosaur. I told my wife I don't like those types of sites due to past problems and she does not go there. It works for us. In fact it would be a deal breaker for me if she was to do it. Do you have a line that must not be crossed in your marriage? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MikeB Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 What to do?I think your 1st response was appropriate but getting into a cyber pissing match with this lowlife was a mistake. Best thing is to forget about it; as you said the threats are, in all likelihood, bs. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Art2ro Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 (edited) In the likelihood what he says is true, you better hope he doesn't follow through with his threats to you and your family! Just do what you can that he can not contact or trace you or your family where you live! Good luck to you! Edited June 22, 2011 by Art2ro Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jollygoodfellow Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 Its a simple matter on Facebook,just remove him as a friend and delete his comments.After that its finished unless she adds him as a friend again.I would not bother getting into conversations with people like that when Facebook give the account holder the ways to remove him from her friends. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ekimswish Posted June 22, 2011 Author Posted June 22, 2011 Judging from my previous experience with 2 marriages and more relationships than I should have had, I have an uneasy feeling that your marriage is headed into rough water. Not just from this post but from other things you have written also.I feel that facebook and similar 'social networking' sites are a minefield for lonely women (and probably lonely men). I am only suggesting that you start seriously investigating options that will allow you to spend more quality time with your wife before you have no options.I am a bit of a dinosaur. I told my wife I don't like those types of sites due to past problems and she does not go there. It works for us. In fact it would be a deal breaker for me if she was to do it. Do you have a line that must not be crossed in your marriage?Thanks for your honesty and such. My marriage was probably born on rough water, but maybe because of the rough water, we've been forced to depend and rely on each other quite closely until now. I've often wondered if going to Canada and both having jobs and social lives our own, or having a successful business in the Philippines where money was no longer an issue, are the things that would actually break us up?Me being in Taiwan right now is more of a short term solution to a short term problem. Maybe the short term problem is an offshoot of a longer term problem, but that's something else we'll have to get to the bottom of eventually. I expect her and the kids to join me here next year, if not full-time, at least on a part-time basis. After that, we'll try and get to Canada. My current isolation in Taiwan isn't all bad. I married her young, when I was 25, and spent every bit of free time the last 4 years with her and the kids. As a 29-year-old, it's nice having one last year to live alone and remember what it's like to be an in-shape, athletic, lonely, slob. I've had a lot of fun playing ball with my friends. It's also good in a marriage, from time to time, to step back and realize how special your family is when looking in from the outside. I feel like I appreciate them more. At the same time, we've had some fights, mostly due to communication problems. I see how half of marriages end in divorce these days - probably more factoring in multiple offenders - and realize we have to be careful. I have no sense of entitlement to an everlasting happiness. As someone married for 4 years, I realize that people married for ten-plus years have a lot more insight of what's coming my way sooner or later. Right now we're in love and have a great sex life. Who knows when that could end? I'm pretty confident in my ability not to cheat, since I had a hard enough time "scoring" even when I was single. I get paranoid sometimes about what she's doing. At the same time, we're innocent until proven guilty.... or at least women are. Men are judged guilty until proven guilty ;)Our biggest problem right now, as I see it, is communicating about money things. I'm going to the Philippines in a week though, and we're definitely going to spend a lot of time talking about these things and designing a plan. Hopefully it works out. Wish me luck! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ekimswish Posted June 22, 2011 Author Posted June 22, 2011 About everything else, I should've just ignored the guy in the first place. The horrible thing about the internet is that you're not face to face, so it's really a confrontation trapped in a never ending time-warp. We've already deleted the guy and blocked him. I should probably still get my wife to modify her name a bit on Facebook. One of the reasons I wrote this, but ran out of time, was because I was wondering about how everything would play out if there were a live confrontation. On one hand, if he came to my wife's hometown, he's an outsider, we know everyone, and I believe - and my wife probably believes all the more strongly - that everyone would have our back and he'd be the one in danger. On the other hand, money talks, and the Philippines is pretty poor. I wonder if he'd be able to pay a local to attack us, and they'd flip that easily against one of their own? Last, but not least, because of all the horrible things he says about Filipinos in the message he wrote me, I wonder if that'd be enough to trump money and turn Filipinos against him?Anyways, 99% likely this guy's "character" is a fictional creation of his own imagination, acting tough over the internet. But in my own crazy imagination, which one of the above scenarios do you think wins out: hometown loyalty, corruption of money, or ethnic pride against a slandering outsider? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jake Posted June 22, 2011 Posted June 22, 2011 About everything else, I should've just ignored the guy in the first place. The horrible thing about the internet is that you're not face to face, so it's really a confrontation trapped in a never ending time-warp. We've already deleted the guy and blocked him. I should probably still get my wife to modify her name a bit on Facebook. One of the reasons I wrote this, but ran out of time, was because I was wondering about how everything would play out if there were a live confrontation. On one hand, if he came to my wife's hometown, he's an outsider, we know everyone, and I believe - and my wife probably believes all the more strongly - that everyone would have our back and he'd be the one in danger. On the other hand, money talks, and the Philippines is pretty poor. I wonder if he'd be able to pay a local to attack us, and they'd flip that easily against one of their own? Last, but not least, because of all the horrible things he says about Filipinos in the message he wrote me, I wonder if that'd be enough to trump money and turn Filipinos against him?Anyways, 99% likely this guy's "character" is a fictional creation of his own imagination, acting tough over the internet. But in my own crazy imagination, which one of the above scenarios do you think wins out: hometown loyalty, corruption of money, or ethnic pride against a slandering outsider? Hello Ekimswish,This douche bag from Sri Lanka will definitely be considered an outsider, in spite of his self proclaimed money connection.As you may know, there is a certain group of people that goes around in scooters collecting money they have lent out. Allof them charge exorbitant interest (5--6 operators) are are looked upon with utter contempt. Generally, they are groupedtogether (India, Paskistan, etc..) and are called "boam byes", a derivative from ancient capital of Bombay, India. If he was stupid enough to actually visit your place of residence, I would like to think that his life will be in serious jeopardy. Your wife's father, elder brothers or uncles would apply the "appropriate" Filipino hospitality. Sleep well my friend -- Jake Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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